Society of Visual Storytelling

    SVSLearn Forums

    • Register
    • Login
    • Search
    • Recent
    • Tags
    • Popular
    • Users
    • Groups
    • Search

    #pitmad #pbpitch feedback thread

    General Discussion
    6
    13
    650
    Loading More Posts
    • Oldest to Newest
    • Newest to Oldest
    • Most Votes
    Reply
    • Reply as topic
    Log in to reply
    This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
    • KathrynAdebayo
      KathrynAdebayo last edited by KathrynAdebayo

      Hi, I think your story line is great! I’m interested to read the book and find out what solution they come up with! To pitch your story with more clarity through the pictures, I might add way more crows to the first image (I didn’t notice them at first, even after reading the text.) or change the point of view to make that the focus. The frog image might be enhanced by including a bar on the phone that shows words the frog might mean before sending the text (sorry, don’t know how to describe that well!) or show a jumble of letters instead of eieio. Also, it might be more clear that the frog sent the previous texts if the one from the husband was above one of the texts that the frog sent, but it wasn’t the “eiei” text. These are just conceptual ideas that may or may not be useful, but I hope that your pitch goes well! I’m rooting for your book!

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
      • KevinTreaccar
        KevinTreaccar last edited by

        Since you can post about a story three times, you should consider posting at least once with the picture and once without. Agents have methods to block links and sometimes images, too, so all with images might get you blocked from view.

        kevintreaccar.com
        instagram.com/kevintreaccar

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • Kevin Longueil
          Kevin Longueil SVS OG @HeatherBouteneff last edited by

          @HeatherBouteneff Hello Heather. What i am remembering from an incredible Storytellers Academy class titled "Submission Ready" is that including comps is super important." including something like "My book is written for children x years old who enjoy, comp title by x author, comp title by x author , and comp title by x author" is what i am remembering. The class was taught by two longtime editors from Chronicle Books. If i remember correctly, including comps shows that you understand the process and will give a hint that you might be easy to work with too. Also Editors have to pitch the books that they are interested in acquiring to other people... so having accurate comps for them is a very good start. I think i recall that including what the affect on the reader is is also something worth including in a pitch. Your pitch sounds awesome! I would read this book for sure!

          Portfolio: kevinlongueil.com
          https://www.instagram.com/kevinlongueil/

          KevinTreaccar 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
          • KevinTreaccar
            KevinTreaccar @Kevin Longueil last edited by

            @Kevin-Longueil I did a local SCBWI conference last month and the agreed upon line on comps was along the lines of: They’re not required, so don’t force them. But if you can nail them – especially with books published in the last 5 years – you’ll really impress the agent(s) because it shows a) you’ve done your homework and b) your book can sell.

            kevintreaccar.com
            instagram.com/kevintreaccar

            Kevin Longueil 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
            • Kevin Longueil
              Kevin Longueil SVS OG @KevinTreaccar last edited by

              @Kevin-Treaccar I forgot about the comps needing to be recent. There were also gentle admonitions to be humble in your comps.. saying that your work will be the next Harry Potter or something of that nature was the example used as something to be avoided.

              Portfolio: kevinlongueil.com
              https://www.instagram.com/kevinlongueil/

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • mag
                mag Pro SVS OG last edited by

                Hi! I would like to chime in if that’s ok. 
I kinda can’t decide what image should I go with and since english is not my first language I’m very unsure of how the pitch sounds like? Does it have clear message and are there too many errors? Any feedback would be much appreciated! Thank you so much!

                my pitch:
                Meet Mike, the magical wish granting cat who can cough up two scooters, a chocolate cake and a cockatoo in one sitting. But, oh no!, something went wrong, the wishes are now stuck in his belly and it’s up to two elderly ladies to take action.
                and pics:
                spread.jpg mike.jpg characters.jpg

                Mag
                https://www.instagram.com/mag_takac/
                http://mag.takac.name

                RachelArmington 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                • mag
                  mag Pro SVS OG @HeatherBouteneff last edited by

                  @HeatherBouteneff I love the premise! And personally I feel more connected to the second picture. 🙂 Since there's a cute character and a phone. But just my opinion. 🙂

                  Mag
                  https://www.instagram.com/mag_takac/
                  http://mag.takac.name

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • RachelArmington
                    RachelArmington @mag last edited by RachelArmington

                    @mag said in #pitmad #pbpitch feedback thread:

                    Mag, I love you style and color palette!

                    You can post three times throughout the day, but need to have a slight variation each time so that Twitter doesn't mark you post as spam...so you could use each picture on different pitches throughout the day, and that would be enough change AND people could see more of your art.

                    The only suggestion I could see is pretty minor, to add a hyphen between "wish granting" (so that it would be "wish-granting cat").

                    Good luck! As a cat lover, I would love reading your book!

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                    • KevinTreaccar
                      KevinTreaccar last edited by

                      If you have Twitter and are interested, you can help boost tweets with RTs.

                      I just saw Heather’s. Here’s a link:
                      https://twitter.com/hbouteneff/status/1400443334867525634?s=21

                      My first tweet is here:
                      https://twitter.com/kevintreaccar/status/1400439843809906691?s=21

                      Feel free to post Twitter links below and maybe we can all help boost each other. Just remember not to like any.

                      (Sorry if I’m hijacking this thread)

                      kevintreaccar.com
                      instagram.com/kevintreaccar

                      RachelArmington 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
                      • RachelArmington
                        RachelArmington @KevinTreaccar last edited by

                        Mag's pitch is at
                        https://twitter.com/mag_takac/status/1400426903417274373

                        My pinned pitch is at
                        https://twitter.com/RachelArmington/status/1400422370712686593

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
                        • KevinTreaccar
                          KevinTreaccar last edited by

                          A second tweet if anyone wants to RT:
                          https://twitter.com/kevintreaccar/status/1400497777503842308?s=21

                          Greatly appreciated if so.

                          kevintreaccar.com
                          instagram.com/kevintreaccar

                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • First post
                            Last post