Saying Goodbye: Let's share our WIPs
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I heard a story I thought I could illustrate for the prompt, although there are only a few days before the deadline--I'm not sure how to do it though and I would love some help from the brain trust.
The story went like this:
Long ago, (1888) there was once a poor boy who lived in the Midwest on a farm with his mother. His father left him a violin, which he loved very much, and would play and play every opportunity that he got--to the point that sometimes it would be locked up until he did his chores. When he grew up he was invited to try out for the territorial orchestra, which would play all over the area. After he finished playing, the man said "You are the most accomplished violinist I have ever heard west of Denver," and offered him a place in the orchestra effective that fall, which would pay very well. The next week, his Bishop (the leader of his congregation) called him into his office and asked "Is there any way you can put off playing in the orchestra for a couple of years? Before you start earning money, you owe something to God: Will you accept the call to serve a two-year mission teaching people the Gospel of Jesus Christ?" The young man told his bishop that if there was any way he could raise the money required, he would accept the call. He went home and told his mother that he had been called on a mission and asked if there was any way they could raise the money for him to go.His mother looked at him and said, "There is one thing of value that we own.
If you sell your violin, we will have enough money for you to go on this mission."Six days later he wrote in his journal "I awoke this morning and took my violin from its case. All day long I played the music I loved. In the evening when the light grew dim and I could play no longer, I placed the instrument in its case. It is enough. Tomorrow I leave for my mission."
Forty-five years later, he wrote in his journal "The greatest decision I ever made in my life was to give up something I truly loved to the God I loved even more. He has never forgotten me for it."
(the greatest decision of my life- FollowHIM podcast)
There is a clear moment of saying goodbye, when he played his violin all day before selling it to fund his mission, but how can I show the whole story? obviously, it is a young man, in a small dusty worn farm room, playing the violin, with the case open and the music. but how can I show that this is not a private concert, not just practicing, it is a painful and poignant goodbye?
I think the time of day should be as it is getting dim, close to the end, and perhaps his mother and younger siblings are there, and perhaps the person who is going to buy the violin is there? how do I say that in a way that you get it immediately? who would buy a violin for a lot of money over there? how would they look? how would they pay? with a briefcase of cash? a check? would they be old? or middle-aged? what is the one thing they need to hold or wear or have to immediately say this is a purchaser of a very high quality, and well-loved violin?
I suppose for the story there should also be a dusty suitcase prepared, and a good though worn suit laid out to be worn the next day. Maybe there is some sort of visual cue, like a train ticket or some missionary-specific item to cue the viewer that the lover of this violin is leaving it behind?
I also wonder if I could clarify the story by including a line from his journal entry somehow? but that has never gone well for me before, they never get it. How can we say he is not only leaving soon, but letting go of his best friend at this moment?what do you think? thanks a lot everyone
Blog: mamatheartist.blogspot.com
Coloring page newsletter: https://bit.ly/Color-in -
@Fey-Realme this is where dozens of thumbnails come in. It's next to impossible to fix a poor composition after the fact. I'm no expert but it is very difficult in my opinion to compress so so much story into a single image in a way that reads well. Try and pick one singular element / part of the story and focus in on it. That's only my opinion! There may very well be a way of showing everything you need in a way that works. I like the story though.
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@Fey-Realme It depends what you believe the man's relationship with music is. Why is it painful to part with the object?
Is music a medium to connect with his (missing?) father and/or communicate with others? Does he lose his voice and friendships?
Is musical instrument playing a practical skill to work his way out of the lower class? Does he lose the only one opportunity for a luxurious lifestyle?
To him (and the Bishop), the talent for music is not a gift from God. Talent of any sort is often associated with pride and greed. As a story of humility, music is an indulgence he can part with to be a true Christian. Is his last performance an act to cast out sin?
Is the violin a representation for childhood? Creative pursuits are often seen as immaturity. Thinking creatively is not always seen as a kind of intelligence; sometimes its the opposite. Is he giving up innocence to become a respectable man?
I'm answering as though the man completely gave up the pursuit of music... But if the story is really about the object, then I would present the violin prominently, as though it were a character itself.
Whatever the case may be, I imagine the goodbye scene as an intimate moment between the person and a fragment of identity.
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Thank you @MarcRobinson and @willicreate for your thoughtful responses and insight
Thank you for taking time to analyze it and for letting me into your artistic thought process--it is very helpful and encouraging, especially to be reminded of the basics -
Hi! September is a crazy month but I am pushing myself to get something done, even if not very complex. I had some difficulty with the prompt... Here is a sketch of my funny take on it.
Does this answer the prompt?...
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@Oana Awesome! Great expressions on the characters. I would say it answers the prompt but "saying goodbye" takes a backseat to the main story of the hidden dog. Building a narrative is the whole point of these challenges and you've done a great job telling a funny story here!
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@Reb-Erlik Thank you! I was not sure how it reads, this will help me finish it!
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Dived right into coloring, I want to try fading a bit the lines this time
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@Reb-Erlik Now that I finished the image I can see better how far I deviated from the prompt, you are right! Actually, I had started quite differently: the kid was going to school for the first time, the mother was worried, a teddy bear weaved him goodbye, the mum held the teddybear.. then the teddy went in the kid's backpack to confort him at school.. it really was about "goodbye"... but I didn't manage to make it work. Then this ideea popped into my head and I immediately was able to draw it... :))) So there it is
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@Oana It looks great in color! Don't worry about the concept too much. If sentimental isn't your thing, stick with funny! Really good storytelling here; I bet our teachers will love it!
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As I used Procreate, I remembered it saves a video of the process and thought it might be interesting to post it here.
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@Reb-Erlik I really liked your concept, very beautiful ideea and concept sketches. I didn't have much time to comment but I am waiting to see the final image!
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Trying to choose a background layout. Which is better? Balcony or alley?
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@Reb-Erlik personally a big fan of the balcony
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@Reb-Erlik I like the balcony more
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@Mariana-B @Henry-Compton @Oana Thanks for the feedback, everyone!
I'm trying out a few more ideas for the background.
Kind of liking having her on a dock and the letters are floating on sea foam.
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@Reb-Erlik those are a lot of good concepts!
Painting water specially sea foam is so difficult! But I like the strong emotion that a tempestuous sea carries! However with the composition as it is, almost feel like there are 3 equally strong focuses, the sea splashing onto the deck, the paper bird, and the woman.
I see that you used the same women sketch in all the concepts, but I don’t know if you are thinking of it as a placeholder, or really holding on that specific sketch.
It’s a great sketch , the proportions of the woman are great and her pose looks really natural.
I personally struggle wanting to draw/explore other poses/angles after I get a sketch I really love! And I don’t know if that’s the case with you too, but maybe play around a little, if you allow yourself to re-draw the woman, you will not feel tempted to draw a background that will fit the pre-drawn woman but instead it will free you to try different concepts/angles as a whole?I hope it makes sense, although I don’t consider myself great at compositions, but I hope it’s helpful in any way. I can’t wait to see the final!
I had to step away from mine for a few days, I have been having terrible migraine, but I am enjoying seeing all the great work everyone is posting.
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@Mariana-B Thanks Mariana! I will keep in mind to make the seafoam a different value than the characters so it doesn't steal focus.
As for the character, I tried out several other poses in thumbnails earlier (you can scroll up near the top of this thread to see them) and decided it had to be this one to show enough detail on both characters.
I'm glad you like the dock! I was so indecisive on this background but I think this one is the winner.
Thanks for your feedback! Hope you feel better soon! -
I like the humor of the boy hiding a puppy in his backpack. That also gives the illustration more story than just having a child wave goodbye. I have a thought that may or may not work to push this even further. What if the mom was trying to talk to the boy (or even to a third person) and he was trying to shoo her off as quickly as possible before she had a chance to notice the puppy, maybe pointing at her car or keys or something. "Good BYE, Mom! See you later! You don't want to be late for work!"
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Pencils done. Might resize some things and add darker values.
