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    Children's book critique

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    • bdyanne
      bdyanne last edited by

      I am new to digital art, still figuring out the program (sketchbook) and have very little formal training. I am looking for critique on a story I'm working on. For context, it is about birthdays and some text for the page includes,"They made quite a mess, there was little they didn't get into..."

      It looks like there is maybe too much going on. I'm not happy with the composition or the color theme, but I don't know how to fix it. I need new, more experienced eyes! Please help!

      Critique.jpg

      Will Terry 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • bharris
        bharris last edited by

        If you're subscribed to SVS the Creative Composition class would be very helpful! One thing I'm noticing is that you have many different focal points and they are all spread out. You want an image to "read" form you main focal point to a few others, so the first step would be to choose which action going on to be the focal point of this visual story. I imagine it would be the character with the dog eating the cake and you could bring that a little more center and larger in the picture, from there you can arrange the other dogs around that point.

        Personally I would enlarge some of the items such as the fridge, the whole thing doesn't have to be in the frame. Also think about what would really be around a fridge and it will be more real. If you enlarge the items you can get the dogs to be a bit bigger too and create some overlapping that will make the space seem more full, instead of having everything spread out.

        You're colors are good, but I think they need to be re-arranged to have the eye go where you want it too, right now it goes right to the red couch and not to your main character. The Working with Color class really helped me!

        I hope that helps!

        www.brittanyharrisillustration.com/
        www.instagram.com/britillustration/

        bdyanne 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
        • bdyanne
          bdyanne @bharris last edited by

          @bharris Thank you for your feedback! I will try enlarging the fridge, and overlapping the dogs. The only problem with bringing the main character more center is it is supposed to be a two-page spread. I think they would end up in the crease. I will try it though!

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          • bharris
            bharris last edited by

            Try dividing the page and then do a break down of the page with the character on it and see if you can place them a little differently. 🙂 Glad to talk!

            www.brittanyharrisillustration.com/
            www.instagram.com/britillustration/

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            • Will Terry
              Will Terry @bdyanne last edited by

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              • Will Terry
                Will Terry @bdyanne last edited by

                @bdyanne Hi Beverly, Thank you for being brave and posting your work here in our forums! It takes guts to ask for help!

                You've already received some great advice...

                Here are a few of my suggestions. Thank you for letting me work on your piece... 🙂critique.jpg

                bdyanne 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                • bdyanne
                  bdyanne @Will Terry last edited by

                  @Will-Terry Thank you so much! It's so cool to see it from a different perspective. Just from this one critique I'm finding myself wanting to change many things on many pages. Everything you pointed out makes so much sense, I wish I could see it on my own. I see some more classes from SVS in my future...

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                  • Will Terry
                    Will Terry last edited by

                    It all comes in stages - don't beat yourself up - it takes years to get where you want to be 🙂

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