Astrid WIP feedback appreciated!

[DanetteDraws]

Oh, and great suggestion from @Fabienne on the warm light source! The second one is much better. Now you should make Astrid warmer too

[Fabienne]

Thanks Danette. That's what I want to get at.
@Maile-McCarthy Hope, you don't mind, that I worked over your piece. Maybe expand your canvas size to give your text more space.

[Rich Green]

I feel like Astrid would immediately see the birds and that goes against the prompt "thought she didn't see anything". To fix this, perhaps have her looking like she exited the craft going towards her right (the direction she is now looking) so it appears as though she has not turned around and noticed the birds yet. As opposed to having her body facing them and only her head looking away? Either that or maybe keep her drawn this way but have her further back still in the entryway of the craft to make her look as if she is just starting to step out cautiously. The other comment I have is that currently the curious bird on the craft would end up in the gutter of the book (since you have a double page spread here). So I might be inclined to move that bird over in some way to avoid it getting lost in the gutter. But with all of that said I love the overall look/feel of this piece - its really engaging!

[Maile McCarthy]

Hi @Rich-Green @Fabienne @DanetteDraws

Thank you all so much. This is incredibly helpful!! I've roughed in the changes suggested so far. I like this so much better, especially with Astrid pushed back into the craft a bit. Are the eyes working for you in this position, or do you still think she'd see the birds?

[Rob Smith]

I like the limited pallete of the first posting. I do like the textures you've incorporated in the last image. What if some of the birds, instead of being in her line of sight, were instead peaking all around the craft. Just thoughts. I think you have an interesting idea here. Nice job!

[Maile McCarthy]

@Rob-Smith Ooh, I like the idea of the birds poking their heads around the craft. I'll get working on it and see what I can come up with. Thanks for your feedback.

[Rich Green]

@Maile-McCarthy The combination of the warm yellow light suggested by @DanetteDraws coming out of the craft and then you moving Astrid back in the doorway is wonderful! I think these changes really worked well together.

[Naroth Kean]

Oh I love this already, the mood is great. I really enjoy her reaction to the dark as she walks out. This is just for fun, I would make the craft looks a little bit more craft like object, even some windows would be fun as well. I would also bring the text box down a bit so the shape/space made up by the bush could flow a bit nicer, probably Down Arrow Key 2 or 3 times (sorry I'm from a graphic background person). Looking great and good luck!

[Steve Young]

Wow, very good. I would add some color to the creatures and a little to the background.

[Maile McCarthy]

@Steve-Young @Naroth-Cow Thanks for your feedback. I'll start incorporating your suggestions and update when I have something to show.