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    Granny Can't Find Her Glasses Thumbnails

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    • MOO
      MOO SVS OG last edited by MOO

      Any critiques welcome. Thanks. Text placement won't be as it is.

      0_1544909484427_48370733_10216554254702364_3140330716462579712_o.jpg

      0_1544909497665_48277643_10216554254822367_8621827125059518464_o.jpg

      0_1544909509855_48397802_10216554254662363_9041871967375851520_o.jpg

      Marsha Ottum Owen

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 5
      • braden H
        braden H last edited by

        is this for a book dummy? Something you'll be looking to finish and self publish?

        Also, is there any particular thing you feel needs looking at for critique? Anything you're worried about?

        The ending's a nice touch 🙂 I was lulled into a false sense of security.

        MOO 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
        • KathrynAdebayo
          KathrynAdebayo last edited by

          Hilarious story. I love that it's simple. 🙂 Not too wordy or complex...

          I noticed that you have 32 pages, so if that's intentional, here's a diagram that I found helpful in regards to allocating which page the story starts on and how many spreads you want it to be.

          0_1544980527391_IMG_4877.JPG

          I hope you continue to share this project online because I would love to follow how it's coming along. Best wishes! 🙂

          MOO 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
          • theprairiefox
            theprairiefox last edited by

            Good story. Love the ending. One thing I would suggest is to add light value to the thumbnails I think it would help with reading the layout and display planning.

            -The Prairie Fox
            https://www.instagram.com/theprairiefox
            https://www.theprairiefox.com

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
            • Jeanne.M.Bowman
              Jeanne.M.Bowman last edited by

              I see lots of potential in this story! I am wondering though, if you are making it a picture book for children, why there aren't any children in the story? Kids like to relate to themselves, not so much adults cause we are boring. 😃 Perhaps if you have a kid in there helping her and the cat and dog look, it might be even more fun. Also, could she look for her glasses in more and more outrageous places? Perhaps start in the house or exaggerate the places she searches through? Some of the words were hard for me to read because they slipped off the page in the scan, but I liked the overall flow and beat of the story. I especially love the cat and dog. Great start!

              instagram.com/jeanneillustrates
              jeannebowmanillustrates.com

              MOO 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 3
              • reddprime
                reddprime last edited by

                Good story. I was so glad she found her glasses, and then BAM! Book 2. The cat and dog are cool. Looking forward to watching this one progress.

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                • Sophie Lawson
                  Sophie Lawson last edited by

                  The ending is perfect, made me giggle ... I was drawn into it and really wanted to know if Granny was going to find her Glasses 🙂 The only thing that stood out to me, is something I've been learning via the Creative Composition course, and that is, on pages 3/4 the drawing is in the gutter. That's the only thing I noticed 🙂

                  Be interested to see what this looks like in colour, and I also love the title - got a nice rhythm to it.

                  • SophieLawson.com •
                  YouTube @SOPHiELAWSON

                  MOO 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • MOO
                    MOO SVS OG @braden H last edited by

                    @art-of-b Hello! It's a personal project (an autobiography maybe 🙂 ) Just learning through projects. Thanks.

                    Marsha Ottum Owen

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • MOO
                      MOO SVS OG @KathrynAdebayo last edited by

                      @kathrynadebayo Thanks for the handy chart. I'm aware of the normal layout but, since it's a personal project, I'm kind of going with something close. It's nice to be reminded though. I may still slim it down though. Thanks again!

                      Marsha Ottum Owen

                      KathrynAdebayo 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • MOO
                        MOO SVS OG @Sophie Lawson last edited by

                        @sophie-lawson Thanks, yes it was pointed out to me that I have a couple in danger of the gutter. I've worked that out I think now.....we'll see!

                        Marsha Ottum Owen

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • MOO
                          MOO SVS OG @Jeanne.M.Bowman last edited by

                          @jeanebean Someone else mentioned to me about making more exaggerated searches in weird places so I better consider that! The story is really a personal project and not necessarily for kids. My grandson might like it though, as is 🙂 I've been told that I should have a kid in it before but, I chose to just go with the Granny. Maybe it will be a picture book for the elderly 🙂 I'm surrounded by them anyway!

                          Marsha Ottum Owen

                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • MOO
                            MOO SVS OG last edited by

                            @theprairiefox Good idea. I think I will do that once I get them just the way I want them, before I enlarge and add color. That is a very good plan. Thanks!!

                            Marsha Ottum Owen

                            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                            • MOO
                              MOO SVS OG last edited by

                              I made some changes last night (up until three am, actually). What do yuo think? I'll keep looking it over and see what else there is before I try and do the big ones.

                              0_1545170143821_48404513_10216571713938834_6558307390456856576_o.jpg

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                              0_1545170170675_48363118_10216571714018836_4042178710802006016_o.jpg

                              Marsha Ottum Owen

                              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                              • K
                                Kat SVS OG last edited by

                                Marsha, I think this is a charming story! I love the addition of the dog and cat, they're fun characters. I'm not sure having the last two lines rhyme with each other keeps the same flow as the rest of the story, but this is a great project and I'm looking forward to seeing you develop it. Great job!

                                MOO 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                • KathrynAdebayo
                                  KathrynAdebayo @MOO last edited by

                                  @marsha-kay-ottum-owen I love what you're doing so far. 🙂

                                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                  • MOO
                                    MOO SVS OG @Kat last edited by

                                    @kat thank you ☺️

                                    Marsha Ottum Owen

                                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                    • MOO
                                      MOO SVS OG last edited by

                                      @kathrynadebayo Thanks 😁

                                      Marsha Ottum Owen

                                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                      • MOO
                                        MOO SVS OG @Jeanne.M.Bowman last edited by

                                        @jeanebean I'm also hoping that kids relate to the forgetfulness of Granny (just like they forget). The older we get the more kdlike we get, I think. After all we often end up toddling and in diapers! (not there yet...thankfully)

                                        Marsha Ottum Owen

                                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                        • MOO
                                          MOO SVS OG last edited by MOO

                                          Still working on this! I've been getting some other critiques too. Here are some pages of my latest changes.... !

                                          0_1547789204862_50057231_10216807849002063_6683504252616179712_o.jpg

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                                          0_1547789267313_50094251_10216807842081890_4791030220482150400_o (1).jpg

                                          Marsha Ottum Owen

                                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                          • MOO
                                            MOO SVS OG last edited by

                                            Oh! One more.

                                            0_1547789511751_50057231_10216807849002063_6683504252616179712_o.jpg

                                            Marsha Ottum Owen

                                            demotlj 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
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