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    FEEDBACK PLEASE! Feb. Contest NIGHTFALL rough sketch.

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    • xin li
      xin li @jenithornhill last edited by

      @jenithornhill It is a lovely start of a piece. I like the overall value structure: the dark tree framing a scene with a light background and darker figures in them. It reads really well. I think it is also a very ambitions illustration with many characters and details.

      What will help you continue developing the image might be to take a moment and think a bit further on the storytelling aspect.

      1. How do the characters feel in this story? (bears might be victorious, the campers might be scared, etc.) What do they want?
      2. Who's point of view is this story? (who is the main character here?)
      3. What do you want the reader to feel when they see the image?
        Once you figured out the story, it is much easier to decide the first read, second, and third. It also makes it easier to make the shape and color choice.

      Hope this helps. Looking forward to seeing this image develop further.

      Web: www.lixin.no
      IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • jenithornhill
        jenithornhill last edited by

        I have done a little more work on this... (a little work that took a long time!) I think some of it will be easier to make out now. I have shaded the foreground section just to visually separate it while I am working.
        My biggest question at this point is about the linework on the bear. I have used a solid line to outline everything so far, but a sketchy-furry line for the outline of the bear. Does that look ok? Should I do a solid line?Thumbnail nightfall.jpg

        Jennifer Thornhill
        www.jenniferthornhill.ca
        www.instagram.com/jenniferthornhillillo
        https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.lockethornhill

        KaraDaniel 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 3
        • KaraDaniel
          KaraDaniel @jenithornhill last edited by

          @jenithornhill The bear is adorable. I love the fur lines. I'm wondering, if you are presenting this as an actual spread, that the bears faces may be too close to the spine? Also there is something off with the canoe...is it too big? I don't know. Maybe someone else can give better advice on that. It just feels in competition with the young bear. I would almost be tempted to make the background a forest and let it just be a dark background since there are so many fun details going on in the fore and mid ground already. Overall I love the concept and can't wait to see your progress!

          instagram.com/sha_kara
          karadaniel.net

          jenithornhill 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • jenithornhill
            jenithornhill last edited by

            bear fur example.JPG
            I am still undecided. Here is a close up clip of the 2 styles of fur. I think the line work on the bear with the sandwich looks more consistent with the rest of the piece. But the bear with the marshmallows looks fluffier.
            What do you guys think? Which one should I go with?

            Jennifer Thornhill
            www.jenniferthornhill.ca
            www.instagram.com/jenniferthornhillillo
            https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.lockethornhill

            Kaela McCoy 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • jenithornhill
              jenithornhill @KaraDaniel last edited by

              @KaraDaniel I have moved the canoe a dozen times now. I think it may have to come out. I need to keep the moonlight though because I am counting on it lighting up the campsite.

              Jennifer Thornhill
              www.jenniferthornhill.ca
              www.instagram.com/jenniferthornhillillo
              https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.lockethornhill

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • Kaela McCoy
                Kaela McCoy @jenithornhill last edited by

                @jenithornhill I love the line work of the bear with the marshmello bag! Nice texture. I see your dilemma though, because both are so nice!

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • T
                  teresaro last edited by

                  I'd remove the canoe. Both bears look very cute but I feel like the one with the marshmallows is too soft and faded for such a defined foreground. The details in the bushes is just getting all my attention but maybe it'll change once you line and color the whole thing.

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • jenithornhill
                    jenithornhill last edited by

                    Capture.JPG
                    I thought I would share today's progress. It is slow going... but I hope to have it done by the end of the month.
                    I am still considering getting rid of the canoe...

                    Jennifer Thornhill
                    www.jenniferthornhill.ca
                    www.instagram.com/jenniferthornhillillo
                    https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.lockethornhill

                    KaraDaniel 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                    • KaraDaniel
                      KaraDaniel @jenithornhill last edited by

                      @jenithornhill looking good. I'm noticing a tangent where the chip bag is touching the rocks on the fire pit...it's took me a minute to realize they weren't connected. Color may help to rectify that but it could just be an easy fix of lowering the bag a touch. Love the bears!

                      instagram.com/sha_kara
                      karadaniel.net

                      jenithornhill 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • jenithornhill
                        jenithornhill @KaraDaniel last edited by

                        @KaraDaniel thanks...I didnt notice that. I will make that part of the bag curl up a bit more so it doesn't touch. I dont think coloring would help...its a clear plastic bag.

                        Jennifer Thornhill
                        www.jenniferthornhill.ca
                        www.instagram.com/jenniferthornhillillo
                        https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.lockethornhill

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