Feedback Welcomed - Sequential Work for my Website!

[NessIllustration]

@Michael-Angelo-Go I'm very sorry that you've been a victim of bullying yourself, Michael. I agree with you that your depiction is realistic, but that's not really the issue here... The depiction is just a bit too intense for a picture book, in my opinion. We do often see more intense bullying in animation, true, but you have to remember the average target market for animation is also older. For picture books, it's in the 2-6 years old range. As you say, the tone of bullying in animation is also often much lighter. The bullied kids look sad, angry or helpless, but like they'll be ok. I think the big difference is is your character doesn't look just sad or isolated, she looks like she's in very extreme psychological distress. And that's just a little bit too intense for 3-4 year old kids, realistic or no.. I agree with @Melissa-Bailey-0 's suggestions: if you removed the finger and make the girl look sad and embarrassed (rather than crying puddles and scarred for life) it would help a lot in making the piece less traumatic. It would also make more sense with the story you're trying to tell: as discouraging, racist and sad it is to get told you shouldn't enter a pageant because you won't win, I don't think it necessarily would create the amount of extreme distress you're depicting. I also think one of the things that bother me most about it is that with the desks facing us, the person pointing the finger would be the teacher which makes your piece not just about bullying but implies child abuse and adults joining in the cruelty, which is really distressing and also a dangerous message. In a children's book, you want to encourage kids to talk to adults about the bullying. And even if in your story the teacher is one of the people telling her she won't win, I should would hope the teacher would stop their "helpful advice" when the child is crying and looking this distressed. I think you're taking it too far, and you can tell the story of Maganda better if you're not this extreme with the depictions, especially considering your audience.

To recap, if you adjust her expression to sad and discouraged (but remove the puddles of tears and grabbing her head in distress) and remove the finger, I think this piece would be good to go.

[Michael Angelo Go]

Hello @NessIllustration, I made three iterations. Regarding her head size, I think it's pretty proportional in the original. She's leaning forward so her head should appear to be much bigger and her body smaller in comparison. If you notice, her body gets narrower downward from her shoulders. But in these sketches, she's just sitting up straight.

Imagine in all these scenarios the teacher is not taking the lead in the bullying. Instead it's just Maganda reacting to her surroundings.

[NessIllustration]

@Michael-Angelo-Go I think all 3 work! Whichever you prefer As for the size of the head though, the perspective of the desk and the classroom doesn't suggest that you can get this drastic of a head size just from her leaning over. It is not an extreme perspective, you know? There's no angle she can lean forward, in this position sitting at her desk, that would result in such a drastic change to the size of her head.

[Michael Angelo Go]

Hey @NessIllustration I just recovered just from burnout. Here's what I ended up making.

Now that I reflect on my decision making. Another reason that the original image was so extreme was because this piece is also meant to show I can convey emotion in a non-stiff way. She's kind of stiff now, but now she doesn't look traumatized.

[Michael Angelo Go]

I'm trying something new! This is for my next set of sequential work with the plushie character of my cousin.

I have a Bachelor's Degree in architecture and I use Rhino. Rhino is a 3D software very similar to Google SketchUp except a lot more complex and less user-friendly. For this scene, I am rendering a life-sized hot wheels race track, where my cousin is on a toy go-cart similar to the ones from the Mario kart games competing with other players.

My idea for him is that he's going to be riding several different vehicles (race car, helicopter, and submarine). The idea here is that he's playing with toysized version of these things, and imagining himself actually in them.

[Michael Angelo Go]

[Michael Angelo Go]

[Michael Angelo Go]

[Michael Angelo Go]

This felt like forever, but I'm glad I'm done drawing it.

[Nyrryl Cadiz]

@Michael-Angelo-Go this is beautiful. On a related news, my province recently held a pageant where contestants did not wear a lick of makeup. I love how the beauty standards in the Philippines are changing.

[Michael Angelo Go]

Happy late Valentines day!

[jakecrowe]

@Michael-Angelo-Go This is adorable. May I suggest playing with textures? Everything here is roughly the same texture, there's little variation between the cotton candy and the balloon for example. Pushing the rubbery-ness of the balloon and the cotton texture of the cotton candy will really elevate the image.

[Michael Angelo Go]

@jakecrowe

How's this?

[Michael Angelo Go]

I also made another version.

[Michael Angelo Go]

I should have mentioned that these drawings are inspired by two children's books. 'Daddy's Roommate' and 'Heather has Two Mommies'.

The one with the two moms is actually a redraw of a scene in the actual book, but the one with the two dads is an original scene I thought up using licensed(?) characters.