Critique please?

[APHOTICMOTH]

Please don't take this harshly.

To me it looks like you aren't looking at your reference enough, you are focusing more on your drawing. Put them side by side, and look back and forth quickly, you will see where the drastic differences are.

Second note, I do not see any pressure sensitivity in your lines, at all. Fresco has that, so are you using your finger, or a non pressure sensitive stylus? If you do not have a pressure sensitive stylus, I would recommend doing it traditionally, and refine it by tracing on a light pad. You can get them so cheap now. I use a "light tracer" that I've had for about 15+ years. I use my light table religiously, especially to clean up really over sketched pieces.

It just feels like your pieces need some more refining before moving onto inks, you are trying to finish them too early. It's a start though, I see where you are going.

[lpetiti]

@CLCanadyArts that’s actually what I do with reference, I’ll put it as a separate layer on the screen when I’m working and work off of that. I wasn’t aware that it looked like I wasn’t really working off of my reference so I’ll work on that. I was trying to not do things like directly trace off of the photos I was working with and make them my own, but perhaps I went too far away from the reference, sort of swung the pendulum the other way

I do use an Apple Pencil actually (I can’t imagine ever drawing on a tablet with my finger, never have done that personally because it always has seen liked such a clunky option). I use pressure sensitivity too, but I think I’m still learning how to work with the pressure sensitivity of the ink pens and vector pens I’ve been using at such small detailed levels, because I’ve definitely been frustrated with my struggles with them before.

Could you recommend anything I could do to practice the line sensitivity? I realized that even in traditional pen and ink work I struggle with it and definitely want to get better

I really appreciate the recommendation of refining the sketching more. Since these are based off of my Inktober idea from last year I think I was in the inktober mindset of doing them quickly I’ll slow down, definitely.

[lpetiti]

@Michael-Angelo-Go yeah, expect I believe the one I used was in black and white (I’m on my phone now so I don’t have the reference in front of me). See the nose issue? I struggled a lot to get the shape of her nose correct which is probably why the end result is so odd.

Thank you for taking so much time to help me with this! I really do appreciate it, these are some of my favorite pieces and I want them to get better

[lpetiti]

@Michael-Angelo-Go and @CLCanadyArts

So I went back and flattened the original Mary Pickford image, just so I can make a clean start of things. I stopped using a rastered ink brush, because I think that’s what’s making it look really rough and unfinished. I started using a basic tapered brush and started focusing on things like edge quality.

What I’m wondering is: is this starting to go in a stronger/better direction? Are the slightly more rounded shapes starting to make her more traditionally feminine?

Thank you both so much for your notes!

[NessIllustration]

@lpetiti I think the face shape in the original image is because her face is turned much more towards the viewer than yours is. The key is how much space there is between her right eye and the side of her face, and also the way the neck attaches to the face. The way you positioned the eyes make it seem like her head is much more 3/4 angle, and then it looks weird that there's no cheekbone at all. In general I agree with @CLCanadyArts that you are straying a bit too far from your references. Making it yours is cool, but before you can do that it would help you so much to sharpen your observation skills. As it is, the choices you make of what to keep vs. what to change, instead of enhancing the original image and make it more appealing, end up often creating problems in the anatomy that where not there before. I suggest improving your observation skills by trying to stick as close to your reference images as you can (including the shadows, which you also have a bit of trouble with). Enhancing those skills will significantly boost your overall ability and help you when you decide to start stylizing reference images to make them yours

[lpetiti]

@NessIllustration thank you! As I’ve been sorting through all of the critiques, I’ve been thinking about what it is that’s been the most difficult for me. I realized this morning what’s going on. I admit that I’m embarrassed that I’m still having such trouble with the basics. Why? Because I feel like they shouldn’t still be an issue for me after all of this time. Hearing crits that all have one theme in common (work on the basics) makes me wonder what the heck I was doing in art school when I should have been learning and mastering these things. You’d think that being there for five years would have gotten it to click for me, plus another five years out of school‍️I see all this amazing work you guys do and...yeah...feel embarrassed/ashamed at where I am (even though I know everyone struggles with different things)

Anyway, what I think I might do is go back and really work on the reference again.

[NessIllustration]

@lpetiti Oh hun there's no need to feel embarrassed! Mastering the basics is a life-long journey. I still practice anatomy and observation with frequent live drawing sessions (now online of course). I also notice that many artists stop practicing the basics way too early because they think "they should have mastered it by now"... Mostly it just ends up slowing their growth. Forget what you think should or shouldn't be an issue, and just keep working on your weaknesses and keep improving at your own pace

[lpetiti]

@NessIllustration I’m starting to realize that. I really appreciate this community and all of your support!

[lpetiti]

Ok, last post about this today since you’ve all been so wonderful! Am I heading into the right direction?

[kylebeaudette]

@lpetiti huge improvement!!

[lpetiti]

@kylebeaudette thank you so much!

[NessIllustration]

@lpetiti Wow such an improvement!!

[lpetiti]

@NessIllustration thank you! I really took everyone’s comments to heart, and watching your YouTube art business videos as I workedThey are awesome!

[APHOTICMOTH]

@lpetiti Woah. Huge improvement yes! Like night and day.

Don't be embarrassed, art is a struggle, with practice we get better, with focused practice we get better quicker.

Inking is hard, the undo button is my friend. Traditional inking, I go slow, and often throw pieces away because there are just too many oopses, this is where the light table is a blessing. Not sure how to help with the inking in fresco, would have to download it to figure out the quirks. I struggle horribly to ink on the ipad, and found that playing with the pressure curve in the program helped, bought some nice brushes from Max Ulichney https://maxpacks.com/ for procreate, that helped a TON. Every brush has a different feel, play with the settings, find what works for you.

Also bought a rubber gummy pencil cover, Dollar store 6 pack dr. seuss, to make a wider grip for the apple pencil, it was so hard to control with it skinny, and it's top heavy. I have weakness in my hands. https://twitter.com/oheysteenz/status/1348781329085833216 Here is a thread of people talking about how they tweaked theirs. Here are some photos from the thread:

How you hold your pencil can make a massive difference, and if plain bare works for you, then cool cool.

I almost resold my ipad, because it was so friggen hard to ink, I was angry and stuck. Between, good brushes, tweak the pressure curve, and getting a stylus cover that made it comfortable, I now am happy to work on my ipad, still struggle here and there, but not wanting to chuck it across the room.

Inking is personal taste whether you like subtle taper, or sharp long taper, playing with line weight, often an artist will ink, then go back and touch up lines to add more line weight, or erase some here and there.

Blah blah blah, sorry for the long post. Love the new version, hope to see more from you.

[lpetiti]

@CLCanadyArts no need to apologize, it had great information! I love the idea about creating a guard on my pencil, I know it’s probably going to help, especially since the reason I didn’t do these for Inktober last year was because my tennis elbow was so bad I couldn’t hold a pencil, much less draw

I’ve learned so much from these critiques today!

[APHOTICMOTH]

@lpetiti Tennis elbow is no fun. I bet stylus wraps will help to some extent. Finding a comfortable position for your arm will help too. I had to put padding on my chair arm (finally got a small recliner with fat padded arms), because of nerve problems. Bend my arm too much for a short time and my hands go numb.. I also am so weak that I cannot hold my arms up to draw, nor can I hold an ipad up, so finding a good position where you can focus all your energy on drawing is helpful. I often stick a stuffed animal under my arm, or a wadded up blanket.

[lpetiti]

@CLCanadyArts that’s a great idea! I usually work on my couch which is probably a really dumb idea‍️I think I’ll try some different positions for working now