Society of Visual Storytelling

    SVSLearn Forums

    • Register
    • Login
    • Search
    • Recent
    • Tags
    • Popular
    • Users
    • Groups
    • Search

    A "Storm" WIP that lacks cuteness

    Artwork
    9
    21
    1185
    Loading More Posts
    • Oldest to Newest
    • Newest to Oldest
    • Most Votes
    Reply
    • Reply as topic
    Log in to reply
    This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
    • PenAndrew
      PenAndrew @Jeremiahbrown last edited by

      @Jeremiahbrown I think I would bring the child forward creating more of a triangular composition and focus which also allows you to show more of the child, as at the moment they are all alongside one another, you could also knock the parents down in value. I think the arrows and directions have to be either less pronounced or more pronounced. Excellent rendering as always.

      Jeremiahbrown 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • Jeremiahbrown
        Jeremiahbrown @PenAndrew last edited by

        @PenAndrew Thank you, those are great suggestions. I'll play around.
        @jdubz Haha, there's potential there somewhere

        Jeremiah Brown
        www.jeremiahbrownillustration.com
        https://www.instagram.com/jeremiah.brownillustration/

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • lizardillo
          lizardillo last edited by

          Hi @Jeremiahbrown, this is yet another wonderfully rendered illustration of yours. I've just managed to watch the 'Lucky' Critique Arena (wow, that was crazy wasn't it?! 😂) and Will kindly did a draw-over on my illustration which had the same kind of layout as this. He changed one of the elements to be in the foreground and it really made a difference, just as @PenAndrew has already mentioned above ⬆️.

          Even if you feel this would not be suitable to get into the last 16 for Critique Arena I would suggest to keep it, as this may be a great portfolio piece to show an editorial style illustration.

          Website: lizardillo.co.uk
          IG: instagram.com/lizardillo

          Jeremiahbrown PenAndrew 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 2
          • Jeremiahbrown
            Jeremiahbrown @lizardillo last edited by

            @lizardillo @PenAndrew I took your advice and gave it another go.
            318F26A9-4A1A-4F6E-9F71-BB0F6A94D15C.jpeg

            Jeremiah Brown
            www.jeremiahbrownillustration.com
            https://www.instagram.com/jeremiah.brownillustration/

            AngelinaKizz Kristen Lango PenAndrew lizardillo 4 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 4
            • AngelinaKizz
              AngelinaKizz @Jeremiahbrown last edited by

              @Jeremiahbrown that really enhanced your story! The girl is much more the focal point, and she feels more ignored.

              www.evarartistry.com
              www.Instagram.com/evarartistry/

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
              • Kristen Lango
                Kristen Lango @Jeremiahbrown last edited by

                @Jeremiahbrown oh that really helped! I think this is much improved - the only thing I'd maybe change now is the direction that the mom is looking in... right now it seems she is kind of looking into the distance, and I think it might be even more effective if her glare was darting at the dad, which will give an even bigger emphasis to this young girl being really forgotten in the storm.

                https://www.kristenlango.com/
                https://www.instagram.com/kristendraws/

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                • PenAndrew
                  PenAndrew @Jeremiahbrown last edited by PenAndrew

                  @Jeremiahbrown Yes, it is visually stronger, and now the sense of isolation and hurt is stronger too, and I like the trail leading to her.

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                  • PenAndrew
                    PenAndrew @Jeremiahbrown last edited by PenAndrew

                    @Jeremiahbrown this is so much fun- with the comments and I love the Princess jasmine costume and what this says about the character.

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                    • PenAndrew
                      PenAndrew @lizardillo last edited by

                      @lizardillo I am still waiting to see this Lucky critique arena. It sounds like a not to be missed episode!

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                      • lizardillo
                        lizardillo @Jeremiahbrown last edited by

                        @Jeremiahbrown That’s really working now 👍👍👍

                        Website: lizardillo.co.uk
                        IG: instagram.com/lizardillo

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                        • Jeremiahbrown
                          Jeremiahbrown last edited by

                          Thanks for all of the feedback!

                          Jeremiah Brown
                          www.jeremiahbrownillustration.com
                          https://www.instagram.com/jeremiah.brownillustration/

                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • First post
                            Last post