Society of Visual Storytelling

    SVSLearn Forums

    • Register
    • Login
    • Search
    • Recent
    • Tags
    • Popular
    • Users
    • Groups
    • Search

    Feedback: Full Spread Composition

    Projects
    feedback
    3
    7
    463
    Loading More Posts
    • Oldest to Newest
    • Newest to Oldest
    • Most Votes
    Reply
    • Reply as topic
    Log in to reply
    This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
    • Griffin McPherson
      Griffin McPherson last edited by

      Onto the next piece for my portfolio project.

      This is the first full spread illustration I’ve ever done and also the first one I’ve done that leaves room for text so I’m bitting off a lot but hopefully not more than I can chew.

      I’m sure full spreads with text offer some compositional challenges so I really want to have a spot on composition for this. I’d like this piece to feel tense and exciting so bare that in mind and let me know what I can improve on!
      F583CF52-85A5-412E-97F0-2B3F2227446B.jpeg

      Asyas_illos 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
      • Asyas_illos
        Asyas_illos @Griffin McPherson last edited by

        @Griffin wow you are cruising along! Faster than me!😉 I think this is headed in good direction, I can see how tense it will shape up to be. It’s a little hard to judge at this stage, just make sure you have ample room around the gutter and you should be good. Over looks like a great start 👍🏼

        Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
        www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
        https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
        • Griffin McPherson
          Griffin McPherson last edited by

          UPDATE: line stage is done. I was hoping to be done with this piece by the end of today so I’m going to head right in into color but if there are any issues you see with the line stage let me know!
          Things to note: a lot of this piece hinges on the colors and lighting so some things will look wrong right now like the flame ghost things looking messy due to overlapping with the background but they will be translucent when colored so it should look alright. I the woods look a bit empty but that will be filled in with painted tree shapes without lines so they fade into the background a bit more. 53C9D635-77C0-4AB9-A1C0-5291F1DAFD5B.jpeg

          Asyas_illos Rebecca Jensen 3 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • Asyas_illos
            Asyas_illos @Griffin McPherson last edited by

            @Griffin are planning to put actual text in the spaces provided? Or just showing you can do so? To me the left page looks a bit crowded I would tuck that top spirit up and back a little and give your text a little breathing room.

            Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
            www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
            https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

            Griffin McPherson 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
            • Asyas_illos
              Asyas_illos @Griffin McPherson last edited by

              @Griffin here’s a visual
              C6549082-EF4A-4013-92A4-1FDE6D64E90F.jpeg

              Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
              www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
              https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • Griffin McPherson
                Griffin McPherson @Asyas_illos last edited by

                @Asyas_illos there won't actually be text, just a faded spot to show text would go there. Nonetheless I think you're right about it being overcrowded, thanks!

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                • Rebecca Jensen
                  Rebecca Jensen @Griffin McPherson last edited by

                  @Griffin This is looking so great! If feels like a complete and believable environment and I feel the urgency in the character's faces.

                  One thing that stuck out at me is how in your quick sketch the body pose of the kid in the back of the bronco is more dynamic and reaching. In your line art, the pose has stiffened up, and makes it seem like the vehicle is parked rather than moving. (And I'm unsure now which it is supposed to be).

                  Another little thing, is that I felt like the running kid's path would make more sense closer to the road path. You could move this kid more into the road, or curve the road, if you thought they should be in the path.

                  Sorry if these are late comments! I'm looking forward to seeing the color!

                  Screen Shot 2022-08-07 at 5.46.12 PM.png

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • First post
                    Last post