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    Are these ghost thumbnails clear?

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    • LauraA
      LauraA SVS OG last edited by

      Hello! I haven't been posting much lately because I am working on projects of my own. I posted about this one a while back, but I have gone through dozens of thumbnails on this story since then.

      Just because these drawings are so rudimentary, I'll briefly describe what the elements are: There is an old lady in a bed protecting her face against an angry ghost, who is threatening her with scissors. The smaller girl is throwing a salt shaker at the ghost. All I have to do for now is decide what angle conveys the action best. So just imagine that the details of gestures, expressions, etc., will get worked out. The ghost is against a dark background so that she can be glow-y.

      Which do you think best conveys the action? Other feedback? Thank you!

      Trio-Ophie's-ghosts-Clara-turned-thumbs-after-critique.jpg

      Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauraintorino/
      http://lauraaldersonart.com/

      ajillustrates kirsten-mcg miranda-hoover ? LauraA 5 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • ajillustrates
        ajillustrates @LauraA last edited by

        @LauraA I think Option 1 and 3 are the most dynamic. Personally, I'd go with 3 because it puts most of the emphasis on the girl, who is the most active character in the image. The only thing that I'd change from that thumbnail is to have the old lady turning her face/upper body away from the ghost and towards the viewer. Excited to see where this illustration goes from here!

        https://ajillustrates.com
        https://www.instagram.com/aj.illustrates/

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        • kirsten-mcg
          kirsten-mcg @LauraA last edited by

          @LauraA I agree with @ajillustrates . 1 and 3 are the strongest.

          Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kirsten.mcgonigal.art/
          Portfolio Site: www.kirstenmcgonigalart.com

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          • Anna Lindsay
            Anna Lindsay last edited by

            I agree with @ajillustrates and @kirsten-mcg I think 3 is the strongest. Looking forward to seeing how it develops 🙂

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            • miranda-hoover
              miranda-hoover @LauraA last edited by

              @LauraA Hmmm... Definitely 1 or 3. I like 3 the most, but I feel like it makes the girl on the right the focus (and it sounds like you want the ghost the be the focus)--so I might go with 1. Both look great so far!

              https://www.instagram.com/mirananemone

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              • ?
                A Former User @LauraA last edited by

                @LauraA 3 is the most dynamic, but 1 works as well.

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                • LauraA
                  LauraA SVS OG @LauraA last edited by LauraA

                  Thank you for your votes! Does it change anything if I reverse them? Maybe it reads better L to R.

                  @miranda-hoover, I was wondering the same thing: The action of throwing the salt makes the little girl Ophie the most dynamic part of the composition, and in fact, she is the protagonist of the story, but does making her throw the salt take away from the action of the ghost threatening the old lady with the scissors?

                  @ajillustrates You make an interesting point about the old lady. If I can make it look purely defensive, it might work.

                  Trio-Ophie's-ghosts-Clara-turned-thumbs-after-critique-(mirrored).jpg

                  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauraintorino/
                  http://lauraaldersonart.com/

                  ArtMelC 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • ArtMelC
                    ArtMelC @LauraA last edited by

                    @LauraA My gut feel says 1 but I can't pinpoint exactly why. I think maybeee 3 is a tad cramped around the ghost and the old lady, and I saw a couple of potential tangents in the area that might break the composition.

                    www.instagram.com/art.melc.illo/
                    www.artmelc.com
                    I write weekly on mondayblues.substack.com

                    LauraA 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • LauraA
                      LauraA SVS OG @ArtMelC last edited by

                      I took all of your feedback and made some more thumbs. This time I took time to think more about the ghost's pose, because the text says that Ophie (the little girl) threw the salt and it hit Clara (the ghost) in the chest. So either it has to be the moment before and Clara is turned to threaten Mrs. C, or is has to be a second later when Clara is turned towards Ophie and the salt hits. To give myself a way to depict Clara (the ghost) still fully concentrated on threatening Mrs. C without the salt hitting her in the back, I also tried a version in which Ophie is across the bed throwing the salt at a perpendicular angle. And then I flipped each of the three versions to see if it affected the story. Right now I like 1b and 3b best because of the movement. I also turned Mrs. C's head towards the viewer.

                      What do you think?

                      Trio-Ophie's-ghosts-Clara-turned-thumbs-after-critique-2.jpg

                      Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauraintorino/
                      http://lauraaldersonart.com/

                      miranda-hoover 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                      • miranda-hoover
                        miranda-hoover @LauraA last edited by

                        @LauraA I like how Mrs. C is looking toward the viewer.

                        I like 2B and 3B the best. But I think I like 2B the most because of the tighter crop and composition (the characters have a little more range in size), plus it focuses more on a single action (throwing of the salt). In 3B your attention is split between two actions: the salt and the attacking.

                        To answer your previous question in relation to the previous thumbnails, I think it does take away from it--but not in a bad way. It's showing the viewer that at that moment the salt throwing is what the viewer should be paying attention to (which all depends on what you want to go for).

                        https://www.instagram.com/mirananemone

                        LauraA 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                        • LauraA
                          LauraA SVS OG @miranda-hoover last edited by

                          @miranda-hoover I think you hit the nail on the head, @miranda-hoover. One action has to take precedence. Thanks.

                          Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauraintorino/
                          http://lauraaldersonart.com/

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