MerMAY challenge WIP Critiques wanted...
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@Jason-Bowen Thanks! Oooo. I do like that pose. I was thinking of a different narrative, though one that I guess doesn't translate yet. I was thinking the story is that he's hunting for something or someone. Maybe a scuba diver who has dared enter his domain. I was thinking about putting someone hiding in the background in some kelp or coral.
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@Jason-Bowen But I think I will play around with your idea too. It will be a good exercise for me in Photoshop. I can work on both and see which has a better story.
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@chrisaakins sounds good, I'm glad it's given you ideas
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@chrisaakins This is looking really good. Wish I could help out with the neck but I'm still working on figure drawing robo beans
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Hey @chrisaakins, nice work on this merman its coming along. I think maybe you could try a darker background to make the character pop more. Or make your character darker and leave your background light. Also I think there is some inconsistency with your line weight. It looks like the light is coming from the top left corner so all your lines facing towards that direction could be thinner and then thicker for the lines facing away from the light, such as the bottom. Hope that helps!
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Hi Chris
I like your merman! I think the problem with the neck anatomy is mainly because of the direction of the muscle in the neck that is fastened in the collar bone and right beneath the ear. And maybe the head is a bit far to the left.... You could try making your own reference by taking a photo of your own head in the pose you want, to get an idea of how the anatomy will work in that pose (this is what I do when I run into specific anatomy problems )
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Great piece to start with. Lots of great advice already. I like the pose that @Jason-Bowen did with it. In terms of graphic novel style, I can see this fitting right in. I prefer to punch the colors up, but that is personal preference though.
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@Chip-Valecek yeah I agree with the colour punching, I have started doing that too
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@karolifo good call. I will try and fix that.
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So I made some changes. I tried to punch up the color but decided to put a vivid light on it instead. I darkened the background and added a kelp forest. I think it reads better now that he is hunting for someone or something in the forest. I tried to fix the neck but decided to hide it with a gill cover. Oh well. Is it better?
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@chrisaakins I like the vibrant colors. I think if the seaweed was darker it would pop even more.
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Have a go at putting your character in different poses than you can choose your favourite one. Just a thought.
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@Jason-Bowen I actually did many thumbnails before I drew it. I like the sinuous feel of this pose. A sort of swirling coiling eel feel. So I think I'll keep it. I hope that once it's finished it'll make sense.
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@chrisaakins oh ok, looking forward to seeing it finished
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@chrisaakins This is so great! Love the detail & colors! I think the issue with the pose is it pulls your eye to the left, but then there’s nothing catch it or to pull it back onto the canvas. What if you scoot him over to the right & have something appearing in the direction he’s looking. A small school of fish (swimming back toward the center), an ominous light, etc. it doesn’t have to give away the surprise of the prey.
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@alicia that is a good point. I will see if I can do that. Can you merge just three layers on PS?
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Thank you @alicia , @Sara-Hickman @Chip-Valecek and @Jason-Bowen and others who provided feedback.
Here is the final version I hope. I think I may need to be done, at least for a little while.
BIG QUESTION: How does it read? What story is it telling?
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@chrisaakins I see him looking anxious, peering over at a shark that is stalking him. The moment before! AAAGGGHHHH! Really nice drawing!
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@chrisaakins In answer to your questions:
How does it read? It's easy to read. But I wish I could see the Merman's eye better.
What story is it telling? Agree with @Marsha-Kay-Ottum-Owen's comment. There's a feeling of lurking danger and suspense with the shark shape and the hiding merman.Other thoughts: The merman's style and that of the background are very different. Both styles are great, but together, they compete with each other. Is there a style you prefer?
One way to blend the styles better would be to take the color palette of the background, and the painterly style, and apply that to your merman. I hope you don't mind that I did a sample drawover to show better what I mean. Doing this means sacrificing your detailed line work, however. On ther other hand, I also think going with the merman's style and applying that to the background could look cool, as well. But that might take more time.
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@Johanna-Kim I do see what you mean. I was trying to emulate a comic book style. Often they have painted backgrounds and inked foregrounds. I may add some ink to the background since I don't want to lose the line work. to see if that works. As far as the eye goes, I was thinking deep black.
Thanks for the input!
