Society of Visual Storytelling

    SVSLearn Forums

    • Register
    • Login
    • Search
    • Recent
    • Tags
    • Popular
    • Users
    • Groups
    • Search

    Critique request for book spreads.

    Artwork
    14
    42
    2409
    Loading More Posts
    • Oldest to Newest
    • Newest to Oldest
    • Most Votes
    Reply
    • Reply as topic
    Log in to reply
    This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
    • xin li
      xin li @NessIllustration last edited by

      @NessIllustration thank so much you for the suggestions. I will try with powdered snow and northern lights.
      And thank you for weigh in on the watercolor idea. I think you are right - I might paint one or two from the book after the deadline for my portfolio.
      @peteolczyk thank you for the feedback. yes. I think I will try with a subtle northern lights in the background.

      Web: www.lixin.no
      IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
      • xin li
        xin li last edited by xin li

        I am working on a couple of pieces at the same time, still working on the Twinkle Little Star spread. I am finishing up another spread and would like to have a second opinion before I present it to the client as the final art. The song is about flowers in early spring. The emotional keywords for this image are "optimistic, warm". The book is for baby and toddlers (0-3 years old)

        1. Does the image fit the keywords?
        2. Anything that is not working for you?

        Web: www.lixin.no
        IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

        StudioLooong 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 4
        • StudioLooong
          StudioLooong @xin li last edited by

          @xin-li I think maybe it's just the position of the boy's eyebrows but to me he comes off as apprehensive or maybe a bit worried, like a nervous smile. I really like the composition and rendering. The little mice are adorable. I think that maybe it would communicate "warm" better if the overall color of the piece were a bit warmer, the green in the upper right reads as warm to me but at the bottom of the page it starts to get cooler, the yellow is on the cooler side for a yellow and the other flowers are a cool purple, maybe you could just play with adjustment curves a bit or add in some small pink or red flowers to warm it up a hair. I think the combo of them wearing sweaters, the way it looks like the foliage is blowing in the wind, and the cooler green tones make me think of it more of it as a cool or crisp rather than warm - it's really close though.

          Taylor Woolley
          (Formerly Taylor Ackerman / StudioLooong)


          Website: www.woolleystories.com
          Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/woolleystories/

          xin li 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • xin li
            xin li @StudioLooong last edited by

            @StudioLooong thank you so much for the input. I always find the color green very challenging. I will tweak a bit for the green color, and the flowers.
            The expression of the boy is not quite right, now that you pointed it out. I will fiddle a bit more on that.

            Web: www.lixin.no
            IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
            • eriberart
              eriberart last edited by

              Lovely work! I love the movement of the grass and flowers, it definitely makes me think of a spring morning.
              I think, with the girl having such a warm coloured outfit, I might add a few pink flowers as well to balance the image out. I'm not sold on the boy's purple jumper, not sure why but to me it doesn't quite fit (maybe cause there are no other purples?) I would play around with the colour of his jumper.

              Instagram and Twitter: @eriberart
              Website: www.erinmcclean.com

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
              • xin li
                xin li last edited by xin li

                Made some adjustments based on @StudioLooong and @eriberart 's inputs. Thank you.

                Web: www.lixin.no
                IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

                peteolczyk 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 7
                • peteolczyk
                  peteolczyk @xin li last edited by

                  @xin-li this picture did cheer me up. Lovely

                  www.peteolczykillustrations.com

                  www.instagram.com/pete_illustrations

                  xin li 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • xin li
                    xin li @peteolczyk last edited by

                    @peteolczyk thank you. I finally got 2 spreads done, and 12 to go :-).

                    Web: www.lixin.no
                    IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                    • xin li
                      xin li last edited by xin li

                      I have no clue how much I can share from the book-in-progress. But I really want to get some feedback from fellow artists here before I send in as final art.
                      Here is another almost finished spread. The song is very energetic, and a bit absurd. It goes something like this "Jump, says the goose. Danse, says the fox. So we jump and we dance, and we sit down".

                      Any thoughts?

                      Web: www.lixin.no
                      IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

                      peteolczyk Laurel Aylesworth 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 3
                      • peteolczyk
                        peteolczyk @xin li last edited by

                        @xin-li could you delete the post once you have the feedback you need? Just to cover yourself.
                        It looks really good to me. The only thing I can spot is there seems to be a line either side that cuts off some of the clouds. But I don’t know if there’s a reason for this. Is it due to a fold when it was scanned?

                        www.peteolczykillustrations.com

                        www.instagram.com/pete_illustrations

                        xin li 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • xin li
                          xin li @peteolczyk last edited by

                          @peteolczyk thank you so much for letting me know about the line cutting off the cloud. It was a mistake. I rotated the cloud to give the image a bit more dynatic, and I forgot to fix the edge, hehehe. I have been staring this image for too long I guess.

                          Removing the post sound like a good solution. I will do as you suggested after I get enough feedback. I will of course share some images once the book is out 🙂

                          Web: www.lixin.no
                          IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                          • Laurel Aylesworth
                            Laurel Aylesworth @xin li last edited by

                            @xin-li Love the music notes on the boy's sweater. Nice touch.

                            www.laurelaylesworth.com
                            instagram.com/laurelaylesworth

                            xin li 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                            • xin li
                              xin li @Laurel Aylesworth last edited by

                              @Laurel-Aylesworth thank you. I thought it helps to have the boy's cloth with a distinct pattern, as he is the character that appears in every page, and also on the cover. This was the editor's wish - have a character that the little readers can follow throughout the book, even though there is no story plot (it is a collection of classical songs and rhythms)

                              I actually tried to make him look more gender-neutral. But it seems that everyone thinks he is a boy anyway. I guess maybe it is the hairstyle.

                              Web: www.lixin.no
                              IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

                              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                              • xin li
                                xin li last edited by xin li

                                I am finalizing the Twinkle Twinkle, little star spread.
                                I have not finished the character and the bed, only put in the flat color to show the value.

                                I am wondering: Does the landscape work? or is it too busy for this scene?

                                Currently, I completed 8 spreads, still 6 to go. Based on how much time used for the 8 spreads, I have just enough time to reach the deadline. It is a bit scary. I just hope no one gets flu before the book due day. I have lost so many days during December because of that.

                                Web: www.lixin.no
                                IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

                                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
                                • xin li
                                  xin li last edited by xin li

                                  I am a bit blind towards this spread. I think I call it done for now, and maybe revisit it a couple of days from now. Any thoughts? (keywords: "magical" and "hopeful")

                                  Web: www.lixin.no
                                  IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

                                  KaraDaniel Chip Valecek NicolaSchofield Kali 4 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 5
                                  • KaraDaniel
                                    KaraDaniel @xin li last edited by

                                    @xin-li I think it's wonderful and conveys your keywords!

                                    instagram.com/sha_kara
                                    karadaniel.net

                                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                    • Chip Valecek
                                      Chip Valecek SVS Team SVS OG @xin li last edited by

                                      @xin-li stunning piece! I think you nailed both the keywords.


                                      https://www.instagram.com/chipvalecek/
                                      https://www.facebook.com/cvalecek
                                      http://www.cshellmedia.com/

                                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                      • NicolaSchofield
                                        NicolaSchofield @xin li last edited by NicolaSchofield

                                        @xin-li definitely magical and very beautiful. It is a joy to look at. Well done and good luck with the deadline on the rest!

                                        Nicola Schofield

                                        Twitter: twitter.com/NSchofieldArt
                                        Instagram: instagram.com/NicolaSchofieldArt/

                                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                        • Kali
                                          Kali @xin li last edited by

                                          @xin-li Xin, this is a beautiful spread! I think you have a really nice balance in contrast and your color palette is really intelligently designed. This is the sort of piece you can get lost in, really great work.

                                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                          • xin li
                                            xin li last edited by

                                            Thank yo guys. I will just keep painting :smiling_face_with_open_mouth:

                                            Web: www.lixin.no
                                            IG: www.instagram.com/lixin.illustration/

                                            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                            • First post
                                              Last post