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    Critique appreciated - tracks in the snowflake

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    • KathrynAdebayo
      KathrynAdebayo last edited by

      @LauraA Hi again, Laura, thanks so much for the link to the video. That was very helpful and I can see how defining large areas with value earlier would help the forms and skin look more natural. Right now my figures are very blendy with less defined values and perhaps values that don’t correspond well with the shapes of the faces and hands. I worked on them a little more, but I feel like I would really need to start over to get the best effect. I’m also not the best at imagining forms and lighting in my head, and with the fire in the background, I don’t have good reference pictures for this image. Maybe better reference images would help too for next time.

      If anyone wants to paint over my piece if you understand better what Laura is trying to explain to me, feel free. 🙂

      @chrisaakins Thanks for the note about the fire. I tried to give it a bit more definition and darken the area behind the snowflake. Any better? It’s still pretty airbrushy, but my hope is that it won’t get too much attention... leave the focus on the other busy elements. Do you think that’s working? Thanks again for your help. 🙂

      I’m also hoping to experiment with some texture at the end so that the piece looks less airbrushed overall.

      6F0172F1-C67F-47BC-9EE9-CCA160DA101B.jpeg

      More critique is always appreciated from anyone who notices things that look off. I’m still working on the snowflake and don’t know if I like the shimmery effect vs. a normal paper look. I haven’t added any shadows to it yet.

      Kevin Longueil 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
      • Kevin Longueil
        Kevin Longueil SVS OG @KathrynAdebayo last edited by

        @KathrynAdebayo This is looking really nice - i do like the new texture on the paper too. I could be wrong on this but i feel like the background does not match the perspective of the foreground - that the background is too high - i feel like the fireplace should actually tilt down and away from us to the right? I put a quick little box around the folded legs of the child to see if it helped me to see and i think it did - our point of view seems much lower for the child than the background - it feel like the point where the floor hits the wall should be just below the child's shoulder - i am not too sure of this but i though i would share it anyways 🙂

        Untitled_Artwork 6.jpg

        Portfolio: kevinlongueil.com
        https://www.instagram.com/kevinlongueil/

        KathrynAdebayo 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • KathrynAdebayo
          KathrynAdebayo @Kevin Longueil last edited by

          @Kevin-Longueil WOW, thank you so much for mentioning this and for taking the time to draw that box. I see now the discrepancy and will have to adjust things. Thanks again. I love how your January piece is turning out. 🙂

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
          • LauraA
            LauraA SVS OG last edited by

            Hi! I do think it has gotten a lot better, especially the boy's face! And the sparkly texture on the snowflake is very nice, too.

            I think maybe I'm partly describing what @chrisaakins called airbrushiness. Airbrushiness is usually not caused only by the brush used but also by not being sure where the shadow delineations should fall. Like you said, good reference or a model would probably help a lot. I know it's getting late in the month to start over (I have a cold now and am staring at my own piece ineffectively), but it's all a learning process. And I still think the piece has such a nice theme and atmosphere!

            Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauraintorino/
            http://lauraaldersonart.com/

            KathrynAdebayo 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • KathrynAdebayo
              KathrynAdebayo @LauraA last edited by

              @LauraA Thanks again for your help! I keep tweaking grandma’s face... I suppose it’ll turn out as well as current capacities allow, and there’s always room for more practice later.

              Here’s the current stage of things... Thanks to @Kevin-Longueil ‘s suggestions. Do the legs look any more natural?

              099C31B3-E6BD-4830-AA5A-99842C1F4B10.jpeg

              Kevin Longueil 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
              • Kevin Longueil
                Kevin Longueil SVS OG @KathrynAdebayo last edited by

                @KathrynAdebayo This looks closer for sure ...it may be that the texture of the carpet the child is on is receding to its own horizon line which is throwing it off a bit still to my eye - When I block out the carpet that the boy is on it seem to be working well - The legs look great!

                Portfolio: kevinlongueil.com
                https://www.instagram.com/kevinlongueil/

                KathrynAdebayo 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • KathrynAdebayo
                  KathrynAdebayo @Kevin Longueil last edited by

                  @Kevin-Longueil ooh, great catch! It’s so helpful to have other eyes see things I haven’t noticed. I think I’ll try to adjust the rug.

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • KathrynAdebayo
                    KathrynAdebayo last edited by

                    Maybe the fire should be adjusted so that the highest contrast isn’t at the top of the boy’s head?

                    BAE139CA-7DCC-49FF-A1FA-64227A5E07D3.jpeg

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                    • KathrynAdebayo
                      KathrynAdebayo last edited by

                      More details... anything stand out as off or missing? Thank you for the help I’ve received with this. I’ve learned a lot of new things about Procreate, which was the goal.

                      61EA362F-4AB0-412C-B3D8-33845226E2E5.jpeg

                      chrisaakins aska 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 3
                      • TessaW
                        TessaW last edited by

                        It's fun seeing the details emerge. What a special, cozy piece!

                        Website: www.tessawrathall.com

                        Instagram: www.instagram.com/tessawrathall_art/

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • chrisaakins
                          chrisaakins @KathrynAdebayo last edited by

                          @KathrynAdebayo this has really come together. It's a sweet and very different take from what the rest of us did. The snowflake is beautiful. Great job!

                          Chris Akins
                          www.chrisakinsart.com
                          www.instagram.com/chrisakinsart/

                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • aska
                            aska @KathrynAdebayo last edited by

                            @KathrynAdebayo very nice!:-)

                            Aska
                            www.mugaska.com
                            https://www.instagram.com/mugaska/
                            https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/mugaska

                            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
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