Feedback request

cianamacaroni

This is a SUPER cute design! I think the anatomy might be a little stiff? Specifically in the arm that's swinging back. The pigeon feels a little rigid even though he's in motion. I also don't totally understand the bread? I know pigeons love breadcrumbs, but I'm not sure why this guy would have a suitcase full of sliced bread. It's also hard to tell whether the pigeon is human-sized (because the bread is so small), or if he exists in world full of tiny animal-sized things. I love the personality and overall silhouette of the design though.

Kyran Weir

@ajillustrates ah thanks for the feedback, that’s really encouraging. You’re right about the tie and collard now that you have mentioned it I can see the mistakes there. Thanks for taking the time!

Kyran Weir

@miranda-hoover thanks Miranda, I appreciate it! (Congrats on being the featured artist by the way!!)
Yeah I will play with the contrast and such, good idea!

Kyran Weir

@RachelArmington thanks Rachel! Good point on the shading, it does make the suitcase stand out a bit. It is digital as well, was trying to use more traditional style brushes so I’m glad it worked haha!

Kyran Weir

@cianamacaroni good shout on the anatomy, I didn’t want it to look stiff so I will keep that in mind.
Well he’s a pigeon trying to ‘make it’ in the business world, and what do pigeons love most? Bread!

carlianne

@Kyran-Weir I just wanted to say welcome and he is SO CUTE I love it.

Kyran Weir

@carlianne thanks a lot!!

Nathalie Kranich

Welcome! The character is super adorable and well rendered. I'd also say that perhaps the neck is a bit too stiff. I understand why you'd draw a pigeon that way, but there is so much haste and action in the image that I think I'd want the whole body to follow suit. Maybe the neck could have bent forward or backwards a bit, or he could have looked quite closely and with shock at the watch.

I think from a storytelling perspective having him **realize ** the time and be shocked might be more engaging than just after he realizes it, when he is speeding up. (this you've communicated really well, but there could just be even more emotion!)

Melissa_Bailey

@Kyran-Weir LOVE this style! Yes, there might be some stiffness in the drawing or some shading tweaks you could make, as mentioned, but there are successful artists working in a very similar style, so for me, I don't think technical skills need as much attention as storytelling.

Why is your pigeon late? What are the stakes? (As mentioned by @cianamacaroni) WHY is he carrying a briefcase full of bread? Is it lunch? Part of his work? Is he human-sized? Or pigeon-sized carrying mini food?

What if everything was in "normal" proportions and he was dragging lifesize bread? What if he was carrying something else that supported the story? What if there was more background or other elements supplying more context? In short: what is the story you want to tell?

You've got a good foundation of skills. My feedback is to focus on your storytelling. ️

miranda-hoover

@Kyran-Weir Aww Thanks! Keep up the good work!