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    My Rabbit Road Race WIP

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    • Patricia Dishmon
      Patricia Dishmon @KevinTreaccar last edited by Patricia Dishmon

      @KevinTreaccar It seems like you are trying to explain too much in one image. For example, your original story requires at least three different illustrations to fully flesh out.
      Here's your original explanation:
      "What's happening is the rabbit that thought he was going to cruise to victory is just now seeing the rabbit he was making fun of for racing with a big, slow truck has almost finished his shortcut to the finish line."

      Illustration 1 explaining the use of shortcuts
      Illustration 2 the rabbit making fun of the other rabbit with the big truck
      Illustration 3 the rabbit cruising to victory and being surprised that he's not gonna win

      You can add more illustrations to flesh out the story. The point is that you can't put all of those things in one.

      Your idea of the shortcut could be your most interesting, imo. You can think of a shortcut that would shock readers and make that the focus of the illustration.

      The extra storytelling elements would be things like the type of truck the rabbit is driving or a unique racing setting, character designs, and facial expressions. This is all easier said than done, but I'd love to see you try again! Post some updates when you can. Hopefully, you can at least do some sketches before you go on vacation!

      KevinTreaccar 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 3
      • KevinTreaccar
        KevinTreaccar @Patricia Dishmon last edited by

        @Patricia-Dishmon Thank you for this assessment. Glass breaking moment if you know How I Met Your Mother.

        I have a writer-first background and I’m definitely trying to fit too much. One of my other thumbnails was multiple moments on the same page. Probably says the moment was too complicated.

        kevintreaccar.com
        instagram.com/kevintreaccar

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • AngelinaKizz
          AngelinaKizz last edited by

          I think you need to show that he took a short cut better.... tracks off the road, veering through the terrain, over the wood bridge and across the finish line. Maybe a sleeping flag waving tortoise that didn't see the cheat...

          www.evarartistry.com
          www.Instagram.com/evarartistry/

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          • ArtMelC
            ArtMelC last edited by ArtMelC

            I think if you want to stick with the shortcut idea, some more obvious imagery that screams "shortcut" would be:

            1. Tire tracks on grass
            2. The car is in the water itself (maybe the river is shallow) though in real life that would totally wreck the old truck
            3. Swing across in a flying fox or just tarzan-style lol

            www.instagram.com/art.melc.illo/
            www.artmelc.com
            I write weekly on mondayblues.substack.com

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            • KevinTreaccar
              KevinTreaccar last edited by

              Working on a new character and story instead now…

              CD022DE4-6490-482B-B9C0-FAF80339A966.jpeg

              kevintreaccar.com
              instagram.com/kevintreaccar

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              • KevinTreaccar
                KevinTreaccar last edited by

                7305E0B0-9A35-45AD-AF11-5233DEFC54DE.jpeg

                Now I need to watch the adding backgrounds class ASAP.

                kevintreaccar.com
                instagram.com/kevintreaccar

                KathrynAdebayo 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
                • KathrynAdebayo
                  KathrynAdebayo @KevinTreaccar last edited by

                  @KevinTreaccar Great design!

                  KevinTreaccar 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                  • KevinTreaccar
                    KevinTreaccar @KathrynAdebayo last edited by

                    @KathrynAdebayo Thank you!

                    kevintreaccar.com
                    instagram.com/kevintreaccar

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                    • KevinTreaccar
                      KevinTreaccar last edited by

                      Working on sketching out (and toning obviously) the middle ground and background right now.

                      86798A21-D5E0-469A-B5C2-077BC5A735BF.jpeg

                      A) See any sketch issues I really need to fix?
                      B ) Any ideas on what you want to see in that field space? I’m constantly bouncing between a bunny burrow home, bunny burrow homes, a carrot field and more.
                      C) Why can I never make up my mind?

                      kevintreaccar.com
                      instagram.com/kevintreaccar

                      kirsten-mcg Asyas_illos Griffin McPherson 3 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 2
                      • kirsten-mcg
                        kirsten-mcg @KevinTreaccar last edited by

                        @KevinTreaccar I love this new concept you've come up with! The story is simple, and much more clear. Of your three ideas above, my vote would be for a bunny burrow home. You could have so much fun designing what a bunny's house would look like! But you might want to consider how your background would further the story you are trying to tell. For example: if you decide to make it a bunny home, maybe the story you are telling could be about a little bunny trying to race against his big brother. You could change up the racetrack a bit to give it more of a homemade feel. Just ask yourself lots of questions about these characters and why they are racing and see what you come up with!

                        Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kirsten.mcgonigal.art/
                        Portfolio Site: www.kirstenmcgonigalart.com

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
                        • Asyas_illos
                          Asyas_illos @KevinTreaccar last edited by

                          @KevinTreaccar much better I think! I like carrot patch…

                          Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                          www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                          https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                          • Griffin McPherson
                            Griffin McPherson @KevinTreaccar last edited by

                            @KevinTreaccar I think the idea of small vs huge could work but the composition could be pushed. If you have a simple and straightforward idea you want to make sure you really push the composition. The truck is huge and intimidating and the car is small and feels weak in comparison. This is obvious to the viewer so how could you make it more interesting to the viewer? What is an angle that could emphasize those ideas?

                            KevinTreaccar 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
                            • KevinTreaccar
                              KevinTreaccar last edited by

                              Shading and lighting (hopefully) tonight. Then I try and see if I push it and finish it in time before my vacation that’s pushing up my deadline by a week. 🤞

                              BC7C7F83-BE7C-456A-A2C6-C6EF6B7082C0.jpeg

                              kevintreaccar.com
                              instagram.com/kevintreaccar

                              Asyas_illos 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                              • Asyas_illos
                                Asyas_illos @KevinTreaccar last edited by

                                @KevinTreaccar it’s coming along nicely!

                                Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                                www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                                https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

                                KevinTreaccar 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                • KevinTreaccar
                                  KevinTreaccar @Griffin McPherson last edited by

                                  @Griffin Thanks. That all makes perfect sense. When I switched concepts, I definitely did things way out of order – not a smooth transition – and I’m noticing issues due to that. Mostly in the composition space.

                                  Still a good learning experience. If I can’t get your suggested pushed version done in time, I still plan to try to work on it in August.

                                  kevintreaccar.com
                                  instagram.com/kevintreaccar

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                                  • KevinTreaccar
                                    KevinTreaccar @Asyas_illos last edited by

                                    @Asyas_illos Thank you!

                                    kevintreaccar.com
                                    instagram.com/kevintreaccar

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                                    • KevinTreaccar
                                      KevinTreaccar last edited by

                                      E05A4AFF-82B2-4A8F-B0F6-43EDB8827951.jpeg

                                      kevintreaccar.com
                                      instagram.com/kevintreaccar

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                                      • KevinTreaccar
                                        KevinTreaccar last edited by

                                        Which do you find most compelling? A, B or C?

                                        A.
                                        3E28AFCE-AB90-4E66-9EBF-707588D38DD9.jpeg

                                        B.
                                        96A0B9F2-5778-4AC4-9841-76F4B272C63F.jpeg

                                        C.
                                        F790230D-6C79-437F-AC9C-B39AEEADFFF5.jpeg

                                        Or maybe some hybrid of A+C or B+C because I screwed up the clouds?

                                        kevintreaccar.com
                                        instagram.com/kevintreaccar

                                        Griffin McPherson kirsten-mcg 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 0
                                        • Griffin McPherson
                                          Griffin McPherson @KevinTreaccar last edited by

                                          @KevinTreaccar I think the sunny day look with A is best though some clouds could add some interest and I would also recommend making the hills darker because they’re a similar value to the clouds

                                          KevinTreaccar 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                                          • kirsten-mcg
                                            kirsten-mcg @KevinTreaccar last edited by kirsten-mcg

                                            @KevinTreaccar The clouds definitely lend an ominous feel to the piece. I would go with them if that's what you're going for. The sunny day (A) feels lighter though, if you're wanting to keep the mood a little lighter.

                                            Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kirsten.mcgonigal.art/
                                            Portfolio Site: www.kirstenmcgonigalart.com

                                            KevinTreaccar 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
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