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    Mouse journey feedback

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    • Asyas_illos
      Asyas_illos @Chantal Goetheer last edited by

      @Chantal-Goetheer it’s just supposed to be like a crevice in the ground I guess. I’m having fun with this mouse, perhaps as I continue the why to his travels will be revealed…

      Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
      www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
      https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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      • Asyas_illos
        Asyas_illos last edited by

        Think I’m going to start another
        26204CF7-D590-4280-9C64-F172E0C425F5.jpeg

        Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
        www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
        https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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        • Blitz55
          Blitz55 last edited by

          Oh wow! I'm really digging these a lot. I love the vibrant colors your using with these. 😃

          Funny enough I'm working slowly on something slightly similar. I gave myself the task of making a short story involving a small Shrew who has to make their way from one end of my property to the other while meeting a few challenges and characters. I even have a few drawings of my shrew among some Mushrooms. 🙂 Though quite different in style and mood from yours.

          Awesome work! Looking forward to seeing more, I'll give you a follow on Instagram. Cheers!

          Draw, Draw, Draw, Draw and Draw Some More!
          Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/levisimpson55/

          Asyas_illos 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
          • Asyas_illos
            Asyas_illos @Blitz55 last edited by

            @Blitz55 thank you! And I’d love to see yours as well😊

            Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
            www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
            https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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            • Asyas_illos
              Asyas_illos last edited by Asyas_illos

              Ok I don’t know why I added this character I thought this one needed something else but I didn’t know what then this popped into my head. But it doesn’t add to the story in any way I could change the mouses eye to be looking that direction, but I could just take the birb off entirely. What do you guys think?
              1C6A5E50-3B50-468F-95AC-F3605E94768C.jpeg

              Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
              www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
              https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

              kirsten-mcg kayleenartlover ajillustrates Griffin McPherson 5 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 1
              • kirsten-mcg
                kirsten-mcg @Asyas_illos last edited by

                @Asyas_illos I think if you made the mouse noticing the bird this could work really well! Right now the bird is a little distracting because I'm not really sure why he's there. But when I imagine the mouse looking at the bird I suddenly want to know more! The story gets more interesting to me.

                Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kirsten.mcgonigal.art/
                Portfolio Site: www.kirstenmcgonigalart.com

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                • kayleenartlover
                  kayleenartlover @Asyas_illos last edited by

                  @Asyas_illos I would save the bird part for a different scene. Maybe during a rain shower.

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                  • kayleenartlover
                    kayleenartlover @Asyas_illos last edited by

                    @Asyas_illos If you squint or make the picture small the mouse blends in with the background a bit, which is probably why the blue bird sticks out.
                    Could the mouse have something on him that is a contrasting color?
                    I don’t know what the story is but if it would fit thematically, maybe add an element of danger by having a snake off to the side or a predatory bird silhouette in the sky?
                    Do bugs or animals live in “mushroom land” and the mouse is passing by?

                    Asyas_illos 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                    • Asyas_illos
                      Asyas_illos @kayleenartlover last edited by

                      @kayleenartlover I think you’re right I’ll probably use it in another scene

                      Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                      www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                      https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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                      • ajillustrates
                        ajillustrates @Asyas_illos last edited by

                        @Asyas_illos I do like the bird (or another background character if you want to switch it out). I think that the mouse doesn't need to be looking at it, but you could add a smaller, less prominent background into the spread, that's looking at and responding to the bird. That'd be a fun way to have the world feel more lived in, and still have the mouse focused on their journey.

                        https://ajillustrates.com
                        https://www.instagram.com/aj.illustrates/

                        Asyas_illos 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                        • Asyas_illos
                          Asyas_illos @ajillustrates last edited by

                          @ajillustrates thanks for the feedback, I have since relocated the bird to another scene, but I still would like to build up more of a lived in world, as you suggested. I will be brainstorming some more characters!

                          Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                          www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                          https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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                          • Griffin McPherson
                            Griffin McPherson @Asyas_illos last edited by

                            @Asyas_illos I think since the bird isn’t relevant to the story it just feel a a bit distracting. I think normally it’s good to have a secondary story going on in an image but in this case since the primary story isn’t super complicated it may not work here

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                            • Griffin McPherson
                              Griffin McPherson last edited by

                              I think using colors from the previous pages is a great way to keep it all connected! Looking forward to seeing more

                              Asyas_illos 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                              • Asyas_illos
                                Asyas_illos @Griffin McPherson last edited by

                                @Griffin-McPherson thanks yep I moved the bird saving him for another. In accordance with your portfolio questions I’m looking to make mine more cohesive as a whole including colors.

                                Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                                www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                                https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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                                • Asyas_illos
                                  Asyas_illos last edited by

                                  Some spreads I’ve started the second I did a while back but wasn’t sure where to go with it, but it seems to fit in perfectly with thisA4D4E25A-1D02-4613-8C12-887717B95791.jpeg

                                  C505E342-4D86-4F71-AE47-963D12C76B7E.jpeg

                                  Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                                  www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                                  https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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                                  • Asyas_illos
                                    Asyas_illos last edited by

                                    How it’s setting up as a sequence, I don’t know why I chose this canvas size but I do love it
                                    A3B04B58-2DA1-4B58-9CA9-8861B68F10AB.jpeg

                                    Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                                    www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                                    https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

                                    tomparsonsart 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 4
                                    • Asyas_illos
                                      Asyas_illos last edited by

                                      Made some changes to this one, still haven’t thought of what characters to add though.
                                      6CC780E6-9FFE-4AC9-9BE4-41973BA89FB3.jpeg

                                      Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                                      www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                                      https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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                                      • Asyas_illos
                                        Asyas_illos last edited by

                                        Needed some spot illos to go with the story. Still working on this, thought it should start at home25E59D48-F03B-4479-AADE-F2BDFB45090D.jpeg

                                        Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                                        www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                                        https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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                                        • tomparsonsart
                                          tomparsonsart @Asyas_illos last edited by

                                          @Asyas_illos I don't have much to add except these are great so far. Really cool shapes and colors. I also like the horizontal format, looks like a story playing out in a movie. Maybe a frame with some character interaction would be good. Although I like how the mouse is just in their little world, reacting to the environment.

                                          www.tomparsonsart.com
                                          https://www.instagram.com/tomparsonsart/

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                                          • Asyas_illos
                                            Asyas_illos @tomparsonsart last edited by

                                            @tomparsonsart yes, I agree I need some more characters in there, thanks!

                                            Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
                                            www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
                                            https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

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