Rabbit Road Race - Rough Phase
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I think something that could be really comical is if you have hills in the background where you can still see the tandem bike continuing on into the distance
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@Johanna-Kim Thanks for your feedback! I'm seeing now how the solo rabbit looks too similar in character design to the tandem rabbits. Perhaps a smaller, "cuter" rabbit with more endearing proportions would better contrast more "sleek" looking tandem rabbits with long limbs. I do want the tandem rabbits to look like a sleek pro team, with a very coordinated look. Hmm, I wonder if adding matching uniforms would get too detailed/cluttered... maybe little bike gloves (plus the helmet/glasses) would be enough. I'll try it in my next draft! Thanks again!
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@kirsten-mcg Oo, good call out on Bears on Wheels! Glad the blowing ears are working for you too.
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@Sarah-VanDam Thanks for your feedback! Character design certainly needs more attention here. At first I thought I wanted the solo rabbit to look similar to the tandem rabbits, so the only differences were that the tandem rabbits outnumbered the solo rabbit, and had a sleeker "pro" look about them. However, I'm thinking now that I should probably push more personality differences between them, so the solo rabbit (and their bike!) is decidedly NOT as sleek as the tandem rabbits.
Re: the environment- I had this idea that there'd be blurring trees everywhere except around the solo rabbit (where you can see more details of the trees), to emphasize that the tandem rabbits are blurring by, but the solo rabbit is "standing still" in comparison. I'm not sure if it'll really come across though... will have to develop it further to see!
Thanks!
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@Griffin Haha! I did consider having the tandem just run off the page so you couldn't see the end at all, but I love your idea of having it continue into the distance! Part of the 'joke' is supposed to be how rabbits reproduce like crazy, so that fits right into that!
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@Rebecca-Jensen You could make the solo bunny a little pudgy, like he decided to enter the race on a whim without training, while the tandem racers are all slick and fit looking. Or maybe the solo biker is on a pieced-together redneck type bike and his clothes are sort of scruffy? Just ideas to play around with.
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@Rebecca-Jensen the bullies could be so absorbed in their bullying that they don't see a rock in the road or something
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Thanks all for the feedback so far!
I gave my characters some more distinctive personality and tweaked the story so that the slower cyclist is in awe of the speedy team. I think this could work, but as I get into details, it's feeling a bit stiff for something that's supposed to be about speed. So I did a quick rough to try to crank it up, and I like the rough, but I abandoned the tandem idea.
So, what do you think? Should I shoehorn the rest of the tandem team into the more energetic sketch? Or does that clutter the story or composition?
Thanks!
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I fleshed out the new sketch a bit, and I prefer these character designs.
The composition feels more symmetrical now (each character roughly centered on each half of the page), which isn't usually something I'd go for, but I think it might work here, where there is direct comparison being made between two characters. What do you think?
Thanks!