Society of Visual Storytelling

    SVSLearn Forums

    • Register
    • Login
    • Search
    • Recent
    • Tags
    • Popular
    • Users
    • Groups
    • Search

    Dragonfly feedback

    Contest
    6
    12
    644
    Loading More Posts
    • Oldest to Newest
    • Newest to Oldest
    • Most Votes
    Reply
    • Reply as topic
    Log in to reply
    This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
    • deboraht
      deboraht last edited by

      Thanks for the catch. I may slightly desaturate the rest of the background as well.

      www.deborahtysonart.com
      Instagram.com/deborahstyson

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • Coley
        Coley last edited by

        I wonder if the kid’s eyes were a little sharper? I’m not sure on that, but was just thinking about the eye being led from dragonfly and then circularly from kids eyes back to dragonfly. Just a thought but I don’t know for sure!
        Also the dragonfly’s body might be a little thin? And the legs are all bent one way?
        I agree with the red pulling the eye, I do like the way you brought focus to the dragonfly via the soft edges in the background. 👍

        https://www.instagram.com/nicoleledrewmay/

        deboraht 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • deboraht
          deboraht @Coley last edited by

          @Coley thanks for your insight. I didn’t notice the legs since I was using a reference photo and now I can’t unsee it. Lol. I’ll play around with the eyes and see what I come up with.

          www.deborahtysonart.com
          Instagram.com/deborahstyson

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • Neha Rawat
            Neha Rawat last edited by

            @deboraht Great foreshortening on the pointing hand! That's always tricky. I like the blurring but I agree about desaturating the background colors a bit.

            Also, the tip of the tail is creating a tangent with the edge of the picture so I'd like a little more breathing room there.

            What is the ground in front of the kids? Is it water? The ground behind the kids looks like soil. I'd like to see a little more definition of soil to water transition.

            https://www.nrbstudio.in/
            https://www.instagram.com/nrbstudio.in

            deboraht 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • Anna Lindsay
              Anna Lindsay last edited by

              I like the blur in the background, it think it works very well. Overall it’s a really sweet illustration! One thing that stood out to me though was the eyes of the child on the left. To me it looks like they aren’t really looking at the dragonfly but rather off to the right somewhere. Very roughly mocked up what it might look like with the pupils shifted slightly. Hope that helps!
              68492B0F-0C8E-450D-BCD0-334D341207AD.jpeg

              deboraht 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • deboraht
                deboraht @Neha Rawat last edited by

                @Neha-Rawat I’m glad the hand is working. 😅 Especially since it goes from in focus to out of focus. I also considered having him holding a phone (camera) or field guide but they covered too much I think.
                I also noticed the tail. I’ll shorten it a segment or two. Funny how sometimes you only see things after you post them.
                Yes, that is water in front of the kids. It’s another thing I was worried wasn’t reading correctly. I already added more shadow at the kids’ feet. I’ll also add some shoreline detail.
                Thank you for your feedback!

                www.deborahtysonart.com
                Instagram.com/deborahstyson

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • deboraht
                  deboraht @Anna Lindsay last edited by

                  @Annabishop excellent eye catch! I’ll fix it. Thank you!

                  www.deborahtysonart.com
                  Instagram.com/deborahstyson

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                  • Valerie Light
                    Valerie Light @deboraht last edited by

                    @deboraht
                    This is such a delightful subject and composition! I like the level of focus on the background kids, but I wonder if you could increase the contrast between what's in focus and what's not by giving yourself just a little bit of sharper detail in the foreground. Like maybe by tilting the wings of the dragonfly toward us just a little more, so you can show off more of that cool sharp glassy detail of the wing pattern.

                    www.valerielightillustration.com
                    www.instagram.com/valerie_light_illustration

                    deboraht 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • deboraht
                      deboraht @Valerie Light last edited by

                      @Valerie-Light wing detail is a must, I agree. I was more focused on angling the wings so they weren’t covering the kids’ faces than making them look cool. Thanks for the feedback!

                      www.deborahtysonart.com
                      Instagram.com/deborahstyson

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                      • deboraht
                        deboraht last edited by deboraht

                        I made some changes and here is the updated version with desaturated background (and a tree removal), I made some tone adjustments and darkened the foreground. I also rendered the water and made a few changes to the dragonfly.
                        5779FFA9-623C-4E67-8588-72DBD1EC72E9.jpeg
                        As I was working on it, I was thinking about how it might appear in a book or magazine. With the detail on the insect, I thought that it would make a fun diagram. I wrote out the body parts in the handwriting they teach my kids at school for an authentic kid look. What do you think... with or without the text?
                        A40424F8-8506-4FA8-8DC8-10450D78C05E.jpeg

                        www.deborahtysonart.com
                        Instagram.com/deborahstyson

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • First post
                          Last post