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    Post-contest Help/Critique of my November Contest Entry

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    critique arena november
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    • JoshuaDages
      JoshuaDages @NessIllustration last edited by

      @NessIllustration Thank you so much for the encouraging words. I see what you mean about the value range as well as the sepia and border. All things that I am looking forward to working on now!

      And yes, I am struggling to get away from the black lines. I come from more of an ink pen background so it's difficult! (Even my #draw50things still has them, haha!)

      Thank you again for your help!
      Josh

      Joshua Dages
      https://www.instagram.com/joshuadagesart/
      https://joshuadages.com/
      https://www.etsy.com/shop/JoshuaDagesArt

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
      • JoshuaDages
        JoshuaDages @Nyrryl Cadiz last edited by

        @Nyrryl-Cadiz Thanks! I agree that her hair needs to be darkened. Would you say that turning her head to show her face a little might help as well? I think that could add to the image and get away from the back-of-head 'sin' in illustration.

        Joshua Dages
        https://www.instagram.com/joshuadagesart/
        https://joshuadages.com/
        https://www.etsy.com/shop/JoshuaDagesArt

        Nyrryl  Cadiz 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
        • JoshuaDages
          JoshuaDages @Rekha Salin 0 last edited by

          @Rekha-Salin-0 Thank you! That's a great idea about the path. Color is not my strong point, so I'm still trying to teach myself the ins-and-outs of warm and cool color contrast with lighting. I will work on the character placement as well! Thanks again!

          Joshua Dages
          https://www.instagram.com/joshuadagesart/
          https://joshuadages.com/
          https://www.etsy.com/shop/JoshuaDagesArt

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • Nyrryl  Cadiz
            Nyrryl Cadiz SVS OG @JoshuaDages last edited by

            @JoshuaDages yes that would help too. 👍

            Portfolio: nyrrylcadiz.com
            Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nyrryl_cadiz/
            YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbJCF1Im8ZO7hpGWTKOJMuA

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • Asyas_illos
              Asyas_illos last edited by Asyas_illos

              I agree with what’s been said already about contrast. Also Maybe you can find some sort of middle ground when it comes to outlining? If you’re wanting to get away from it but it’s also what you’re used to? Play around with your inking a little

              Asyasewardillos@gmail.com
              www.Instagram.com/asyas_illos/
              https://asyasewardillos.wixsite.com/mysite

              JoshuaDages 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
              • chrisaakins
                chrisaakins last edited by

                @JoshuaDages one critique I will add is that you almost never have a character's back to the viewer. (According to Jake and Will)

                Chris Akins
                www.chrisakinsart.com
                www.instagram.com/chrisakinsart/

                JoshuaDages 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                • JoshuaDages
                  JoshuaDages @Asyas_illos last edited by

                  @powsupermum Thanks! Yes, it's good to find that comfortable middle ground, even though it can be challenging to figure out.

                  Joshua Dages
                  https://www.instagram.com/joshuadagesart/
                  https://joshuadages.com/
                  https://www.etsy.com/shop/JoshuaDagesArt

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • JoshuaDages
                    JoshuaDages @chrisaakins last edited by JoshuaDages

                    @chrisaakins Agreed! Working on it now. Thanks!

                    Joshua Dages
                    https://www.instagram.com/joshuadagesart/
                    https://joshuadages.com/
                    https://www.etsy.com/shop/JoshuaDagesArt

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                    • marek.halko
                      marek.halko last edited by

                      Hi Joshua! The image is very sweet. I like the grandma character a lot.
                      I think the biggest improvement would be better value structure. Just more contrast and better silhoullettes, value consistency within bigger shapes, clear edges will help a lot. Comparing adjacent colors : is it darker/lighter , is it warmer / cooler color?
                      Maybe just thinking, what time of a day, weather and light condition you want, might help. And get reference for it if needed. To me it feels like there is a wet, foggy weather in the park, which doesnt corespond with the storybeat.
                      The limited color pallette is a nice idea, but the colors feel a bit incosistent for instance in the girls hair (i suspect you used red to attract more attention).
                      Some other ideas to try:
                      Some experimenting with poses (grandma's more opened arms; grandpa more next to grandma, maybe kneeing, waiting for hug...; the kids feet make quite a tangent there, just showing a little of girls face)?
                      Creating visually clearer path of running characters with big bush shapes?
                      Putting the grandparents characters a bit up hill with overexposed bloomed light behind them to make them more heroic?

                      A little scribble to see what i mean

                      20201219_222132.png

                      JoshuaDages 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 5
                      • Coley
                        Coley last edited by

                        Everyone else already said what I would have added 🙂 BUT didn't you do a really strong oz cover? I'm thinking I remember your oz cover and really loved it....was surprised it didn't make top 16!

                        https://www.instagram.com/nicoleledrewmay/

                        JoshuaDages 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                        • JoshuaDages
                          JoshuaDages @marek.halko last edited by

                          @marek-halko Again, thank you so much for taking the time to sketch out your ideas! I really love how you've changed the perspective and can also see what you mean about the colors (your color palette for your November piece was amazing, by the way).

                          I will continue to work on this piece and am excited to take into account all of your notes. Thanks again!

                          Joshua Dages
                          https://www.instagram.com/joshuadagesart/
                          https://joshuadages.com/
                          https://www.etsy.com/shop/JoshuaDagesArt

                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • JoshuaDages
                            JoshuaDages @Coley last edited by

                            @Coley Thank you for your kind words about my Oz cover. I am very proud of that one as well and have added the updated version to my portfolio website!

                            Joshua Dages
                            https://www.instagram.com/joshuadagesart/
                            https://joshuadages.com/
                            https://www.etsy.com/shop/JoshuaDagesArt

                            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                            • franksandovalart
                              franksandovalart last edited by franksandovalart

                              Hi @JoshuaDages

                              Here is my 2 cents

                              I really like your characters and art style.

                              I agree with my fellow artist.

                              I wanted to give you constructive feedback by respecting your art style and painting over your existing illustration.

                              wanted to show you color variations, warms vs cools, color variety, and by adding neutral colors, you could achieve a very fun color illustration.

                              I think your original color pallet was too monochromatic

                              I hope this was helpful.

                              Keep up the good work!!!

                              1.jpg

                              JoshuaDages 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
                              • JoshuaDages
                                JoshuaDages @franksandovalart last edited by

                                @franksandovalart Thank you as well for the paint over! I like how bright it is and how it really helps the silhouettes. I also love the addition of the girl's headband to allow for her face to show up. I think that I will definitely add that into my new version. Thanks again!

                                Joshua Dages
                                https://www.instagram.com/joshuadagesart/
                                https://joshuadages.com/
                                https://www.etsy.com/shop/JoshuaDagesArt

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