Society of Visual Storytelling

    SVSLearn Forums

    • Register
    • Login
    • Search
    • Recent
    • Tags
    • Popular
    • Users
    • Groups
    • Search

    Something is wrong, but idk what.

    Questions & Comments
    critique criticism questions illustration digital art
    8
    12
    1234
    Loading More Posts
    • Oldest to Newest
    • Newest to Oldest
    • Most Votes
    Reply
    • Reply as topic
    Log in to reply
    This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
    • T
      Tamisha SVS OG last edited by

      I really like your illustration idea. At first glance I see a large amount of space with nothing happening in the grassy area. The layout is great. Perhaps adding some depth variation to create foreground, midground and background. The larger stones at the bottom should be much darker then the rest of the image. Your character should hold his/her arms out just slightly away from the body to create more division and a strong silhouette. Looking foreword to seeing your WIP!

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
      • StudioLooong
        StudioLooong last edited by

        I think that what you have going on with the path is flattening out the composition in an unnatural way. There is great perspective with the rocks getting smaller but that dirt path isnt following the same logic. It's almost as wide up by the person as it is down by the large rock. The rough edges of the grass should scale too, becoming less jagged as it reseeds into the distance.

        1610087918555-8e7b6e5d-dddd-4a2b-8926-4cf608d358a7.jpg

        Quick fix for the path width could be to take out some of the grass in the bottom left.

        1610087918555-8e7b6e5d-dddd-4a2b-8926-4cf608d358a72.jpg

        Taylor Woolley
        (Formerly Taylor Ackerman / StudioLooong)


        Website: www.woolleystories.com
        Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/woolleystories/

        phoenix yip 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
        • NessIllustration
          NessIllustration Pro @phoenix yip last edited by

          @phoenix-yip With the character backlit (with a sunset no less) this is a pretty dramatic lighting scenario which I think you've rendered a bit too mildly. This lighting would produce more this sort of effect:

          Lighting.jpg

          vanessastoilova.com
          instagram.com/vanessa.stoilova/

          Check out my Youtube channel for tips on how to start your career in illustration! www.youtube.com/c/ArtBusinesswithNess

          phoenix yip 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
          • Heather Boyd
            Heather Boyd @phoenix yip last edited by

            @phoenix-yip From first look I might say there is a lot of focus weight and colour at the top. Also maybe the character is larger than he should be in comparison to the size of the sun but I am not sure.

            Instagram: www.instagram.com/heatherboyd.illustration/
            Website: https://heatherboydillustration.ca
            Shop: https://www.inprnt.com/search/products?q=HeatherBoydIllustration
            Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/heatherboydillustration

            Be blessed,

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • phoenix yip
              phoenix yip @StudioLooong last edited by

              @StudioLooong thank you so much!

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • phoenix yip
                phoenix yip @NessIllustration last edited by

                @NessIllustration FFA7F1AC-6F4B-4DBC-B48A-CFE565EB09E4.png
                Is this better? I took your advice and made the lighting more dramatic

                NessIllustration 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
                • Michael Angelo Go
                  Michael Angelo Go last edited by

                  Okay so my feedback might be biased, but I think the problem here is the horizon line. I know what you were trying to go for, creating a great sense of depth with the foreground taking most of the space of this vertical drawing, but it's a little overkill. I'm basing my feedback on this video, it might help you.

                  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upxBGNcryRs&t=699s&ab_channel=BaMAnimation

                  Other than that I don't have much feedback, the others here have given really great feedback.

                  Finis Coronat Opus
                  Instagram: www.instagram.com/madgcartoons/
                  Behance: www.behance.net/madgcartoons
                  Website: https://michaelangelodgo.wixsite.com/madgcartoons

                  phoenix yip Kayla Groening 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • NessIllustration
                    NessIllustration Pro @phoenix yip last edited by

                    @phoenix-yip I think that's a great improvement!!

                    vanessastoilova.com
                    instagram.com/vanessa.stoilova/

                    Check out my Youtube channel for tips on how to start your career in illustration! www.youtube.com/c/ArtBusinesswithNess

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • phoenix yip
                      phoenix yip @Michael Angelo Go last edited by

                      @Michael-Angelo-Go thanks! Yeah that makes sense, I just wanted to make sure the horizon line hit on the third rather than in the middle

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • Melissa_Bailey
                        Melissa_Bailey last edited by

                        Your new color study looks A LOT better! Overall, I really like this sketch. There still seems to be something static to me about the composition, though. Is it the rather flat, straight lines of both the horizon and the path? It raises a lot of questions for me ... why are the rocks so large in the foreground then seem to disappear as the path goes toward the horizon? Does that represent the path getting easier / less obstacles for the character? What is the story behind this composition? Why does the character have both swords drawn? Are they in peril? If so, why do they have a more relaxed posture instead of being poised to fight/defend themselves? Perhaps, if text is meant to be shown alongside the illustration, all that will be answered. But just viewing the illustration by itself, I want to know what the story is. Good job for piquing my curiosity!

                        illustrator - author - smiley person
                        mbaileyart.com
                        instagram.com/mbaileyart/

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                        • Kayla Groening
                          Kayla Groening @Michael Angelo Go last edited by

                          @Michael-Angelo-Go I actually love the original horizon line in terms of storytelling.

                          To me, having the horizon line higher on the page and having the character facing the horizon makes it seem like the character is leaving behind a lot, taking a risk, or heading into the unknown (at least that's how I read it).

                          Kayla Groening
                          Comic/Graphic Novel Artist
                          Storytelling through Art.
                          Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/kaylagroeningillustration
                          Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kayla.groening.illustration/

                          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                          • First post
                            Last post