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    Something is wrong, but idk what.

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    • StudioLooong
      StudioLooong last edited by

      I think that what you have going on with the path is flattening out the composition in an unnatural way. There is great perspective with the rocks getting smaller but that dirt path isnt following the same logic. It's almost as wide up by the person as it is down by the large rock. The rough edges of the grass should scale too, becoming less jagged as it reseeds into the distance.

      1610087918555-8e7b6e5d-dddd-4a2b-8926-4cf608d358a7.jpg

      Quick fix for the path width could be to take out some of the grass in the bottom left.

      1610087918555-8e7b6e5d-dddd-4a2b-8926-4cf608d358a72.jpg

      Taylor Woolley
      (Formerly Taylor Ackerman / StudioLooong)


      Website: www.woolleystories.com
      Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/woolleystories/

      phoenix yip 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
      • NessIllustration
        NessIllustration Pro @phoenix yip last edited by

        @phoenix-yip With the character backlit (with a sunset no less) this is a pretty dramatic lighting scenario which I think you've rendered a bit too mildly. This lighting would produce more this sort of effect:

        Lighting.jpg

        vanessastoilova.com
        instagram.com/vanessa.stoilova/

        Check out my Youtube channel for tips on how to start your career in illustration! www.youtube.com/c/ArtBusinesswithNess

        phoenix yip 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 1
        • Heather Boyd
          Heather Boyd @phoenix yip last edited by

          @phoenix-yip From first look I might say there is a lot of focus weight and colour at the top. Also maybe the character is larger than he should be in comparison to the size of the sun but I am not sure.

          Instagram: www.instagram.com/heatherboyd.illustration/
          Website: https://heatherboydillustration.ca
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          Be blessed,

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • phoenix yip
            phoenix yip @StudioLooong last edited by

            @StudioLooong thank you so much!

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • phoenix yip
              phoenix yip @NessIllustration last edited by

              @NessIllustration FFA7F1AC-6F4B-4DBC-B48A-CFE565EB09E4.png
              Is this better? I took your advice and made the lighting more dramatic

              NessIllustration 1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 2
              • Michael Angelo Go
                Michael Angelo Go last edited by

                Okay so my feedback might be biased, but I think the problem here is the horizon line. I know what you were trying to go for, creating a great sense of depth with the foreground taking most of the space of this vertical drawing, but it's a little overkill. I'm basing my feedback on this video, it might help you.

                https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upxBGNcryRs&t=699s&ab_channel=BaMAnimation

                Other than that I don't have much feedback, the others here have given really great feedback.

                Finis Coronat Opus
                Instagram: www.instagram.com/madgcartoons/
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                phoenix yip Kayla Groening 2 Replies Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • NessIllustration
                  NessIllustration Pro @phoenix yip last edited by

                  @phoenix-yip I think that's a great improvement!!

                  vanessastoilova.com
                  instagram.com/vanessa.stoilova/

                  Check out my Youtube channel for tips on how to start your career in illustration! www.youtube.com/c/ArtBusinesswithNess

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • phoenix yip
                    phoenix yip @Michael Angelo Go last edited by

                    @Michael-Angelo-Go thanks! Yeah that makes sense, I just wanted to make sure the horizon line hit on the third rather than in the middle

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • Melissa_Bailey
                      Melissa_Bailey last edited by

                      Your new color study looks A LOT better! Overall, I really like this sketch. There still seems to be something static to me about the composition, though. Is it the rather flat, straight lines of both the horizon and the path? It raises a lot of questions for me ... why are the rocks so large in the foreground then seem to disappear as the path goes toward the horizon? Does that represent the path getting easier / less obstacles for the character? What is the story behind this composition? Why does the character have both swords drawn? Are they in peril? If so, why do they have a more relaxed posture instead of being poised to fight/defend themselves? Perhaps, if text is meant to be shown alongside the illustration, all that will be answered. But just viewing the illustration by itself, I want to know what the story is. Good job for piquing my curiosity!

                      illustrator - author - smiley person
                      mbaileyart.com
                      instagram.com/mbaileyart/

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • Kayla Groening
                        Kayla Groening @Michael Angelo Go last edited by

                        @Michael-Angelo-Go I actually love the original horizon line in terms of storytelling.

                        To me, having the horizon line higher on the page and having the character facing the horizon makes it seem like the character is leaving behind a lot, taking a risk, or heading into the unknown (at least that's how I read it).

                        Kayla Groening
                        Comic/Graphic Novel Artist
                        Storytelling through Art.
                        Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/kaylagroeningillustration
                        Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kayla.groening.illustration/

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