Personal projects feedback please:|

Asyas_illos

@Nyrryl-Cadiz thanks nyrryl! I was wondering about that a haha.

Asyas_illos

jenn

@Asyas_illos what if the filigree varied in width? Or maybe it should go behind the top right corner of the sign? I like how it adds interest to the background but it does compete a little. However just making it thinner might not fit the scale of the rest of the shapes.

Asyas_illos

@jenn thanks I’ll probably play with it a little more and see what works.

lidia-ull

@Asyas_illos

I just love all of these! Little Alice, the donkey!

The cover design is very well done! I would absolutely have to pick up this book if I saw it on a shelf. You've got nice open space in the design for the eyes to rest and the colors work great. Moving the "a" was a needed and you managed to do it with compromising anything. Yay!

I would like to see if you could bring the sign in front of the border on the right side and definitely try varying the scale of the individual border elements - just for fun. Differing sizes of the swashes might look great with those yummy textures you've got going!

Melissa_Bailey

@Asyas_illos this would be such a FUN book to read! Love the colors and rendering.

Yes, I think that the design would look more balanced if your name was in the bottom left corner. (Just FYI, some books by author-illustrators say "written and illustrated by", but the vast majority just have the author-illustrator's name.)

I really like the hand lettered title. Why is the filigree added? Does it have anything to do with the story? My personal preference is the design without it; it's stronger, in my opinion, because there are already a lot of colors going on!

This will depend on your story and character, but just going on the cover, I feel a discrepancy between the title and the character's expression. The feeling I get from the title is that this is a grumpy or fed-up character that is misunderstood and keeps getting hit with sticks. But the character's expression feels happy and welcoming. So is Tiny Donkey ok with the mix-up and torture? If they're happy, why do they feel the need to clear up the misconception?

Again, LOVE the character and your rendering! Really nice design and story idea!

Asyas_illos

@Melissa_Bailey haha thanks for the feedback, I tried moving that darn eyebrow all over the the place to give him a bit of irritation but nothing was feeling right, it was like he was an old man and I didn’t want that. But I will play with it some some more. As for the border I only added it because it seemed a little too, bare. I like the border but I think I need to make it thinner/smaller. I will also play around with the name thanks again Melissa!

Asyas_illos

@lidia-ull thanks for the feedback! I’m going to work the border a bit more and see if I can pull something off.

Miriam

@Asyas_illos I like the changes so far. My suggestion for the border is to cut out the pieces right next to the donkey (under the nose, next to the hoof, & beside the ear). I think that will simplify it and keep it from competing with the character.

I think the title is a little long. Consider shortening it to "Donkey is NOT a Piñata!" It will come out in the story that it's a tiny donkey & that's the reason people think it's a piñata.

Good luck with all your story ideas!

Asyas_illos

Ok I thinned out the border and fixed his expression also removed the yellow that was in the background. I tried moving my name around and just have my name but to me it just didn’t look right. So this is where it’s at currently I’m gonna let sit for a while while continue to work on the story and sketches. Thank you @Miriam for your suggestions, but I really like the title as it is for now, we’ll see when I come back to it again later. Thanks for the feedback everyone!

Asyas_illos

Wondering what you guys think about this lighting? Is it too much? To chaotic, busy?

kirsten-mcg

@Asyas_illos I love scenes like this where the same character is shown multiple times to crate movement! I'm curious what it would look like if you reduced the saturation of the lights a little, but left Alice and the other objects more saturated. I can't decide if its too much or not, and I feel like looking at two versions side by side would help!

Asyas_illos

@kirsten-mcg I didn’t do a toned down version yet but I have this alternative lighting too

Asyas_illos

Ok made some side by side comps thoughts?

Miriam

@Asyas_illos I like #1

KevinTreaccar

@Asyas_illos I agree on preferring the left side (1 and 2). I could just be missing the light source, but I'm just not sure where the purple light is coming from. There's nothing distracting on 1. Love the image overall.

Asyas_illos

@KevinTreaccar thanks for the feedback! my mind was just playing off the scene where she’s falling and there are flashing colors but they never came any specific light source.

kayleenartlover

@Asyas_illos number 2, the middle right one, I think has just the right amount of colored lighting

Asyas_illos

Thanks @kayleenartlover

Nyrryl Cadiz

@Asyas_illos hi! i think the first lighting is perfect. it's psychedelic and imo is perfect for Alice in Wonderland