Music WIP: Comments Appreciated

demotlj

I like how this is developing; it’s a great picture. Of the two that you just posted, the first one read more easily when I was looking at it on my phone because the contrast was slightly higher than the second. Can’t wait to see the finished piece!

burvantill

After a night away from these last pics all I see are balloons. Lol. I’m going to tone those waaaay down. Put some brighter colors in to the crowd.

burvantill

Okay, here is my latest version next to one from above.

chrisaakins

@burvantill I love it! I assume you are going to saturate your colors more? I think the eyes of the critter with the bat call my attention as a focal point. I think it is a wonderful composition, I can't wait to see the finished project.

burvantill

@chrisaakins thanx! That’s good to know about what you see as the focal point. I’ve stared at it too long it’s hard to tell.

lmrush

Love the concept. I think you need to vary your sizes more and create more of a fore middle and background. I love your line work.

lmrush

Sorry I posted after just looking at the sketch. As I scrolled down I see you have done that in you finals. Look very nice!

Jabbernewt

Oh man, these expression are great! Loving seeing the process (thanks for taking the time to share) and your work is really coming along quite well!

I definitely have a preference between the two images you've shared, being the bottom one, but if you're leaving the background white I think the purple ground ties the image together much better. Furthermore, the whiteness of the rabbit in the first serves as a focal point by virtue of contrast. In the same way, however, the boy with the bat also stands out quite a bit, and I wonder if changing the girl's dress (or some other element in that vicinity which fills a similar volume of visual space) to the same yellow would balance that yellow out and make it so the white pops out more. I see the hula hoop there is yellow, but I'm not sure it's going to spread the balance of the boy's yellow shirt from left to center. Does that makes sense? Feeling a little unable to articulate what I mean, so please let me know if that was a bit difficult to understand.

Again, you're doing so well with this process! I'm excited to see what comes next!

burvantill

@jabbernewt Thankyou for the tips on focus. The feedback from everyone is so helpful.

burvantill

So the other day after I post the two above I walked away from it for a while and when I came back I changed a couple things and added a bunch. It's really rough and loose because I wasn't sure if I was going to keep it. Kinda a quick "let's see what this looks like" kind of thing. Now today I'm reading the posts from @imrush and @Jabbernewt and started laughing because you guys justified my thoughts. Lol! THANK YOU! Like I said it's really rough, but I would still like your comments. The daisy and balloon on the far right bottom will be adjusted, FYI.

chrisaakins

@burvantill Ahhh. I hate to say it, but I liked it better without the closest foreground elements. That is just my two cents. I feel like that is all my eye is drawn to. I do like the balloons though.

burvantill

@chrisaakins good to know, thanx! I appreciate the honesty.

braden H

The foreground elements are a good idea in theory. I agree with @chrisaakins that in this particular way they don't seem to work, though. I may play with it a little before discarding the idea entirely.

burvantill

How bout this?

Chip Valecek

@burvantill I think its coming along great. I like it. The specs on the piece what do you plan to do with them? I was thinking colored confetti would be a nice touch.

chrisaakins

@burvantill I like it!

Jason Bowen

Looks great, the only thing I would move is the balloon thats almost in the drummers face at the back. I would be tempted to move it above him or further forward just so he has a bit of room.

The energy is great in this, great work.

burvantill

@jason-bowen Thank you for the comment. If you are referring to the balloon that is in the drummer bear's face, that one is intentional. He is leaning his head back because its there. I will try to exaggerate that since its not translating. =)x

burvantill

@chip-valecek natural confetti, FLOWERS. LOL! like little cherry blossoms flitting about.

burvantill

@chrisaakins Thanx! I could not have done it without everyones help! =)x
Now for the watercolors!!!